


Welcome to Milton (OLD VERSION)

by armitageadoration



Category: North and South (UK TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-01
Updated: 2017-12-20
Packaged: 2019-02-09 06:38:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 33,211
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12882252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/armitageadoration/pseuds/armitageadoration
Summary: John Thornton and Margaret Thornton were a happy couple. He loved her with all his being. Alas, things were not meant to be for the couple. Margaret died in childbirth, leaving John a widower. With the help of his mother, he was to raise his son alone. Then something miraculous happened.........Please Note: This story has been rewritten completely for a total of 22 chapters. Please visit Welcome to Milton (NEW) instead.





	1. Chapter 1

Robert Copeland stumbled bleary eyed into the kitchen at five in the morning. He hadn’t slept well. The neighbors had company. Their grown sons were outside in the garden most of the night. They had been a touch loud. Yet, Robert wouldn’t complain. They were close friends, to the point that the two boys called him Uncle Bob. Besides, one of the boys rarely got to see his brother and parents due to work commitments.

The scent of fresh brewed coffee was in the air. Frowning, there shouldn’t be a pot on yet. He had just woken up and his wife was away for the next five days. He breathed a sigh of relief when he saw what was placed on top of his favored mug. It was a note from his daughter.

 

_Just me Mum and Dad. Out in the garden._

_xo,_

_A_

Walking outside with his mug, Robert went looking for his daughter. Under the cover of darkness, she sat at a table watching a storm roll in with the rising sun.

“What are you doing here at this hour Alexandria?”

“I needed to get away.”

“From what?”

“Myself?” She sighed. “I got called in last night. Nasty case. Lost the guy on the table.”

Robert understood her feelings all too well. He was a surgeon too. “How do you feel about it?”

“Patient dying? It was a Hail Mary attempt, Dad. Oh and I am going to become a nun. That is my next goal.” Alexandria shrugged her shoulders.

“How did the date go with the gentleman Tim set you up with?”

 “It didn’t, Dad. “ Alex grimaced. “I need to beat some sense into that man.”

“The date or Tim?”

“Mostly Tim, possibly both.”

“I wouldn’t bother with Tim, he would probably enjoy it too much.” Robert laughed.

“Not the visual I ever needed Dad!” Alex laughed with him. Tim was her godparent’s son and a very close friend. The mere thought of him in such a situation was far too close to being incestuous for her.

“How are you, Phillipe and Xavier doing?”

“Good. Everything is up and running at full capacity. X has an excellent head for business. I can’t believe it all finally came together.”

With some of the patents that Alex held on pharmaceuticals, she had gone in business when two close friends bought out a company nearing bankruptcy. With a lot of time and effort they had rebranded a new line of prescription drugs to be sold across the world. It had taken a decade to get everything fully functional.

“Is he ever going to marry that beau of his?”

“Phillipe keeps threatening to make an honest man out of X but it hasn’t happened yet.” She chuckled. “Those two are just meant for each other. I swear. I am not sure who is more adorable.” Alex dropped her head down on to arms bridged across the peaks of her knees. “Dad? I think I am jealous of them, not to mention you and Mum.”

“I wish I could tell you something that would help, but there isn’t.”

“Perhaps I was just born in the wrong time Dad.”

“Why do you say that?”

“I would have been much better married off in one of mom’s classics than trying to forge this on my own. It’s ridiculous. I wouldn’t have to worry about men, marriage, and work. I want a time where there were good men, chivalry wasn’t dead, nor was honesty.  Life could have just fallen into place, I would be told and done.” She paused, looking up for a moment. “Speaking of, where is mum?”

“Conference.”

“Ah. It is that time of year isn’t it? All the literature professors have to sow their wild oats.”

 “I think you would have hated the lack of choice far more than you would having many choices, my girl.” He smiled.

“It doesn’t feel like it Dad, but who knows. Perhaps I am just wishing for a taste of fantasy than the reality that is modern times.”

“I believe you suffer from the same ailment that most surgeons do, sweetheart.”

“Oh?”

“We don’t see patients like doctors with a practice. We are in the trenches. We patch them up and ship them out for others to take care of. You don’t find much personal attachment or warmth with people that way. I think, for you, it has been even harder.”

Nodding, Alex thought over her father’s words. “Possibly.”

“No possibly about it. You graduated at 18 from medical school. Most graduates are closer to 26 to 30. While you handle yourself better because of it, it makes attachments more difficult Alex. You don’t treat a person, you treat their bodies. Perhaps you need to get to know people a bit better? Personally or professionally it may be time for a change.”

Sighing, she nodded. “You aren’t wrong Dad.” The storm was getting closer Alex noticed. “We best go in, this is going to get ugly it looks like.”

Father and daughter both stood. Out of seemingly nowhere a bolt of lightning hit the large tree close to the house.  One of the branches swung low. “DAD! LOOK OUT!” Alex pushed her father out of the way and then everything went dark.

Alexandria woke up with a fierce pain in her head. The bright light of morning only made things worse. Tentatively touching around her scalp, she came away with blood on her fingertips.

“The hell?”

“Miss? Oh Miss! Are you okay?”

Moving to sit up, she looked towards the voice. A woman with an old fashioned bonnet on her head was bending over her.

Alex nodded. “I believe so.”

“Are you Dr. Copeland’s wife Miss? Or perhaps his nurse?”

“What? No. I’m Dr. Alex Copeland.”

“Oh dear.” The large woman stood straight up and wore quite the perplexed expression on her face. “Dr. Alex Copeland from London?”

“Yes. Alexandria Copeland MD. Uhm. Who are you?”

“Dixon ma’am.” She did a little curtsey. “Master Thornton sent me over to get the new doctor situated.”

Alex took the time to truly look around finally. Crates upon crates of medical text were stacked up along the walls. There was one on the floor with its contents spilled. Looking down, Alex noticed that she was not wearing the scrubs and trainers from the night before but a heavy dress that was reminiscent of the early 1860s.

Rising to her feet, Alex put a hand on one of the crates to steady herself. Looking out the window to the street, she shook her head. Concussion, she wondered. Perhaps an accident. Wait.

WAIT! Her mind screamed.

“Miss Dixon? Are you referring to Mr. John Thornton of Marlborough Mills?”

“Yes ma’am, I am.” Miss Dixon peered at Alex and gently pushed back the hair at her temple. “There is some blood right there, let me fetch you something to clean it up.”

“Of course Miss Dixon. Thank you that would be most kind.”

What else could I say, Alex thought. Seeing that I am either in a coma or crazy. Whichever it is I might as well play along for now. So brain, well done. You are playing games and right now that is not what I need Goddamnit. This is all my mother’s fault, damned North and South indeed. Sheesh.

Alex was sure whatever happened sitting outside with her father all she needed was time to heal. She would be back to her own world shortly.

Miss Dixon returned with a bowl of warm water and two cloths. Wetting one, she started to dab carefully at the blood on Alex’s temple. Once the blood was gone Dixon carefully dried the skin.

“If you’ll forgive me for being so bold Miss. You may not wish to get too settled in just yet. I don’t believe Master Thornton realizes that you are a lady and he may not take too kindly to you.”

Alex snorted at being called a lady. She had never ever considered herself that.

She stroked her fingers gingerly over her temple. There was a lump like a goose egg but the wound was merely a scratch. She wasn’t certain what caused the injury, falling books perhaps?

 “Miss Dixon, perhaps I should go introduce myself to this Mr. Thornton of yours.”

While she was speaking, Alex heard a shrill whistle sounding loud and clear on the evening air. It was time for the workers to leave the factories.

 “The workday just ended Miss. That was the last whistle, Master Thornton should be around shortly if you would like to wait.” Dixon wrung her hands together. She was not at all certain how Thornton would take the news. If Miss Margaret was still alive, it would be different Dixon thought.

Alex picked up a carpet bag, going through the paperwork inside. The exchange between what was apparently her employers and Thornton, it did not give Alex’s gender. She smiled wryly. Smart move of them. By the looks of things, Alex had been trained in the US through her father’s practice. He was a former Army doctor. Which was partially true in her own world, Robert Copeland was an Army surgeon that had met and married a British woman. The 21st century Alexandria Copeland had gone to Oxford. Apparently an Adam Bell had recommended Alex for the position in Milton prior to his death several years ago.

Was that Margaret Hale’s godfather? Alex was fairly certain that it was. So what happened to the doctor from the book? Dr. Donaldson? Was that it?

The sharp knock on the door pulled Alex away from her thoughts. Looking up, she went to the door.

“Good afternoon, miss. Are you perhaps Dr. Copeland’s wife?”

“You must be Mr. Thornton of Marlborough Mills?”

“Indeed, I am.”

“Please, come in Mr. Thornton. I apologize for the mess. And there is no Mrs. Copeland other than my own mother. I am, however, Dr. Alex Copeland. Alex is short for Alexandria.”

“Pardon me?” Thornton thought he must have misheard the woman.

“I am Dr. Alexandria ‘Alex’ Copeland Sir.”

“There must be a mistake……”

“No Sir. There is no mistake.” She smiled gently.

“My apologies Miss Copeland, this will not do.”

“It’s Dr. Copeland. Why is that Mr. Thornton?”

“Nobody will wish to see a woman doctor. If you are indeed a doctor.”

“I **_am_** indeed what I say I am Sir.” She studied him with an arched brow. Tall, thickly muscular, a head full of black hair and icy blue eyes. He would be a handsome man if it weren’t for that scowl and the anger in his eyes, Alex mused. The scowl and the look seemed more permanent. She was certain it just wasn’t directed at her.

“There is a train leaving the station at a quarter past, I will get you there and we can have your items returned to you.”

“Mr. Thornton?”

“Yes?” The words were like ice.

“You brought me here. There was a need for a doctor in Milton, correct?”

John Thornton stared at the woman but didn’t answer her question. She was tall, stately. Too tall, alas. Perhaps that is why she became a doctor? What man would want a woman that towered over him? She was just an inch shorter than his own massive height.

“I will assume with you not answering that the answer is indeed a yes there is a need for a doctor here in Milton. As I am already here, why don’t you permit me to try? If it doesn’t work out, then no harm is done and you may find a replacement with someone already here. This way you are not without a doctor on hand.”

Thornton’s expression did not change. She had the same lofty way of speaking that Margaret once had. _Margaret!_ He felt the pain of losing her still. It had been over three years since she passed in childbirth. Thankfully, his mother was able to help with his young son.

“Very well. I suppose there is no choice in the matter. Someone needs to be here to take care of the workers and their families, at least until I can find a replacement for you. The town of Milton needs a real doctor.”

“Oh believe me Mr. Thornton, I am quite real and quite good.” Challenge accepted, she thought.

 

 

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

It had taken the better part of 36 hours for Alex to get everything set up in the small clinic. Apparently, when the long time town doctor passed away, the building and its contents were to be kept for the next physician. It certainly made things easier. There was a small flat within the building that was for the physician to use. The ten bed ward was remarkably well done so were the four private rooms.

Chuckling softly, Alex was amused by how her brain had made everything come together in this bizarre dream. There was plenty of money, clothing, and virtually anything else she needed for herself, at least what was available at the time.

Given the period in time, antibiotics weren’t going to be around for another 60 years or more. The same went for antibacterial soaps. Alexandria was able to make both without really a problem. Thank god she had some knowledge in the realm of pharmaceuticals. Other remedies that she knew worked were mixed together from much of the items the previous physician had on hand.  Splints, plaster of Paris, and other items were quickly added to the stores of things she may need. Notes were jotted messily on pieces of paper. So this writing with a quill was annoying. Alex frowned. She would kill for a good Mont Blanc.

Everything she could think of was done. It took another three days before anyone was willing to chance seeing the lady doctor. Her first patient happened to be brought in by Mrs. Hannah Thornton.

After introductions were made, Alex enquired what the problem was.

“Miss Copeland, this is my grandson John Thornton Jr. We tend to call him Johnny.”

“It’s Doctor Copeland, Mrs. Thornton. Just because I am not male does not mean I am any less of a physician.” The words were mild but Alex looked directly into the woman’s eyes when speaking them.

Alex sat with the worried grandmother for a few moments. It seemed to Hannah Thornton like Alexandria was playing with the boy instead of trying to figure out what was wrong with him. The boy was failing to thrive. He was small for his age. The mucus membranes of the nose were inflamed as were the mouth and throat. He also had a rash around his mouth.

“How is his stool?” Alex gently inquired. She was pretty certain she knew what was wrong.

“Liquid.”

“Vomiting? Itchy areas of his skin?”

“Yes to both.”

“You have a very handsome grandson Mrs. Thornton.” Alex smiled. “What does his diet consist of?”

“Milk, soft fruits and vegetables. Bread soaked in milk. The normal foods you give a child.”

“This may sound strange, but I am positive it will work. Remove all dairy from his diet. No milk, butter, anything of the like. Nothing made with milk or butter either, such as a pastry or pudding. You need to keep him out of anything that comes from a nipple, teat or an udder.”

“DR. COPELAND!” Mrs. Thornton didn’t appreciate the terminology.

“My apologies ma’am.” Christ, she thought. If these people heard what I say in the operating theater they would hang me from a tree.

“I will give you a tincture to give Johnny with every meal as well. Just use it until the bottle runs out. That should help ease some of his discomfort.”

“What is wrong with him?”

Alex actually had to think for a quick half second. When were allergies discovered? Shit. She had no idea. “Dairy products make him ill.” Simple works best, she hoped. “If you would please let his mother know and anyone that may give Johnny food or treats? Having everyone working together will help him feel better faster.”

“His mother died in childbirth.”

“I am truly sorry to hear that Mrs. Thornton.”

She gave the boy back to his grandmother and placed the tincture in a small brown bottle with a cork stopper.

“My son will be along later with your payment Doctor.”

Alex shook her head. “No need Mrs. Thornton. Your son has been kind enough to bring me here and let me stay.”

As the word of a new doctor traveled around the town of Milton, Alexandria became more and more busy. She had done everything from help with a nasty diaper rash to setting and casting broken bones. Even without the modern tools she normally had at her disposal, everything was fairly easy thus far. The upper classes refused to set foot in the small clinic, the workers on the other hand were grateful.

There was something about the working class that Alex appreciated. They could not pay for the services, and she had no problem with that. They took care of her like she was one of their own. Alex was invited for simple Sunday dinners after church. They made sure she was escorted back to the clinic if she was out at night or that she had help with packages while shopping. She even had hired one of the young ladies to help her around the clinic. While she was hoping that this dream would end soon, Dr. Alex Copeland was content in her dream life.

It was about ten days after seeing Mrs. Thornton when there was a rapping on the clinic door. She had closed down for the day but the townspeople knew she was there if they needed anything.

Upon opening the door, she was surprised to see John Thornton Sr. “Mr. Thornton? Is everything alright?”

“Yes. I would like to speak to you if I may?”

“Of course, come in. What may I do for you?” Alex offered Thornton a seat after taking his hat and gloves.

“I wanted to thank you Doctor.”

“For?”

“My son. He is doing much better.”

“I am very pleased to hear that Mr. Thornton.”

“If you would like to stay in Milton, you are most welcome to.”

“Even if I wasn’t welcome Mr. Thornton. I was planning on staying. I believe your workers and the workers at the other mills are better for my being here.” Alex saw his jaw tightened and his lips thinned. He wasn’t used to being talked to as such by a woman. “Mr. Thornton? Do you like what you do?”

“I do not understand.”

“Do you like being the Master of Marlborough Mills?”

“It is what I do.”

“I believe you are misunderstanding me. Do you enjoy it? Do you take pride in the work you do? Do you not treat your workers better than any other cotton mill in the area?”

He still looked somewhat puzzled but finally nodded. “Yes, I do.”

“I feel the same way about my work. I enjoy it. I want to help others.  Your say has no matter in what I do. Just as my say means nothing in the cotton business.”

“I see.” Thornton stood. “We are having a dinner for some of the business people in town. You are, of course, invited.” He handed her a handwritten invitation. It wasn’t as fancy as the Masters dinner he gave every year, so he felt obliged to invite the lady doctor.

“Thank you Mr. Thornton.”

Without another word, he turned and walked out. It left Alex shaking her head at the abrupt behavior of the man. Looking at the invitation, she was amused. The dinner was almost a month away.

Alexandria was pretty certain that she was meant to bring a family member as her chaperone, but there wasn’t one to bring. Going stag, as she called it, was probably not the best form. It was, however, the best she could do.

The dress was navy and silver. It went beautifully with her jet black hair and pale silvery eyes. Thankfully the young lady that she had hired to help her around the clinic worked well with her hair and getting into the dress. Alex wore no jewelry save for a pair of small silver hoop earrings. The matching dancing slippers were hidden by the heavy silk of the dress. Alex was ready to kill for her Nikes already.

Berating herself silently for feeling out of sorts, Dr. Alexandria Copeland stepped out of the carriage before the large home next to the mill. One of the hired footmen escorted her up the stairs and into the fine home.

John Thornton saw Alex enter and drew a sharp breath. Physically, Alex and Margaret looked absolutely nothing alike. Alex was at least a head and a half taller than Margaret had been. Alex’s eyes were bright and sparkling silver grey where Margaret’s had been a warm green and gold. Yet, their bearing was similar. Alexandria had the same stately aloofness that Margaret did.

Most of the guests in the Thornton home turned and stared just as Thornton himself did. Because these were not the people that made up the patient list that Alex had currently, they had no idea who she was. Although he loathed to do it, Thornton made it a point to introduce her to the other guests.

On the other hand, most of the servants either had met Alex or at least knew who she was by sight. The touch of preferential treatment given to her was not unnoticed, especially by the Thorntons.

Hannah Thornton was mildly impressed with the young woman. She had a no nonsense air to her. Being in mixed company that Alexandria did not know must be uncomfortable, yet the doctor appeared perfectly at ease.

“Dr. Copeland, please allow me to introduce you to Mrs. Slickson.”

“A pleasure to meet you ma’am.”

“Likewise my dear. Are you really a doctor?”

“If you both would excuse me for a moment.” Mrs. Thornton needed to see to the dinner.  Both Alexandria and Mrs. Slickson nodded.

Alex smiled. “Yes, I am.”

“Your husband doesn’t mind?”

“I am not married.”

“Oh! You are so young to be a widow. No wonder you must work, you poor dear.” Mrs. Slickson patted Alex’s arm.

“No ma’am. I am not a widow. I have never been married.”

“Oh dear girl, I am sorry to hear such a thing. A pretty young lady like yourself should have a husband and not have to work like you do! What does your father do that he couldn’t make a match for you?”

Temper must be contained. Temper must be contained repeat. “Alas, my parents are no longer with me. But my father, he was a doctor as well. My mother was a school teacher.” Sort of the truth? Mostly? Fuck it, thought Alex. No my parents aren’t here in this crazy dream. My mother is a tenured professor and my father is a surgeon.

When the guests were called to dinner, Alex breathed a sigh of relief.

The men were, of course, talking business. The women kept themselves busy with idle chit-chat. Alex said very little in the scope of things. It was more interesting to her to hear of the time that her mind had dreamed up. Although, she was starting to worry. Shouldn’t she have awoken by now? Was she in a coma? Was this like that movie she had watched recently where people were forgetting the girl and her doctor had become part of her dreamland? Hells bells.

Startled out of her own thoughts, Alex looked up when someone said her name. She wasn’t even sure who had spoken. “My apologies, I was lost in thought.”

“I asked how are you enjoying Milton, Dr. Copeland?”

“Again, my apologies Mr. Thornton. I am enjoying Milton quite a bit. It is very different than London. I believe that to be a good thing. The citizens of Milton are quite refreshing.”

Thornton turned to another guest and asked a similar question. Ah politeness, how I still am not fond of thee thought Alex. The men were getting more adamant on a topic of economics with each other.  

Biting her tongue, Alex tried to keep silent. Trickle-down economics was not a strong favorite topic of conversation. She had no idea that the similar thought process had been around so long. Or maybe it was all a part of this ridiculous dream? Possibly, since she did remember that the original book was in part a social commentary. Feeling a bit daring, she decided to speak.

“Gentlemen? I hate to tell you but prosperity doesn’t trickle down, and nor does civic prosperity. Which is actually what you are complaining about. You consider your workers a drain on society but at the same time you still need them to perform a task that you are unwilling to do yourself. When your hands earn enough to live on, they are far more likely to be contributors to civic prosperity here in Milton. Now remember please this is a town each one of you has declared to love.”

One of the men began to interrupt her, but Alex was having none of that.

“Pardon me, I have not finished Sir. As it is, families who need only one or two jobs to make their ends meet, gives way so that they can be available to help their kids with common day to day problems and keep them out of trouble. With this you will reap the rewards of having workers that are smarter, better educated AND healthy. This means these very same people can look out for you and your neighbors, volunteer, and contribute. This is not just in your schools and churches but in the community as a whole. Prosperity is not about money and that is what you fail to realize. Living in a community of people who are paid enough to contribute to the community in which each of us lives, rather than require its help, is far more important than your bank account. Now, I am not saying that business needs a profit, because it does. You have to make money to be able to keep up with the times and machinery of course. But a prosperous community will always fair better than one in poverty.” Her voice was warm and low. There was a certain rasp to it that made her voice tangible like velvet. It was wholly seductive and it made the dinner party uncomfortable with her entirely and not just the words.

John Thornton was about to say something when there was a shriek from another room. A maid came running in something was wrong with Thornton’s son. John and Hannah both took off fast behind the maid. Without hesitation or thinking, Alex followed the trio up to the family quarters.

John’s son, was a pale bluish color. Alex went into physician mode without thinking. The boy’s pulse was thready and weak. The rash around his mouth looked vibrant, fresh even.

“Thornton hold that candle there.”  Alex ordered.

Tongue swollen. Airway obstructed. Shit. Possible anaphylactic shock.

“I need a sharp knife and a tube. Uh. Something cylindrical small hollow.”

“Doctor will a pipe stem work?”

“Yes.” She didn’t know who asked and didn’t care.

Delicate fingertips found the indentation between the Adam's apple and the Cricoid cartilage on little Johnny’s throat. With a stroke of practiced ease she made a cut, separating the cartilage so that air could flow. The tip of her pinky fingernail slid into the incision while she waited for the pipe. In seconds, the pipe stem was placed in the incision. Alexandria puffed air into the pipe stem twice.

Sitting back she nodded. He was breathing and color was coming back to the boy’s skin. “We need to get him to the clinic.”

Thornton didn’t say a word, but picked his son up and started down the stairs.  In the carriage, he was stock still. Alex was doing all she could for the time being making sure the little boy stayed breathing. 

“Keep him still. He is starting to come around and we don’t need that quite yet.”

They brought the boy in and Alex went to work immediately. “Light some candles please. I am going to need to see.”

She gave the child a very small bit of laudanum to make sure he stayed calm and asleep. Cleaning the wound she made with the knife, she put in a new tube that was clean. There wasn’t a way to keep things completely sterile there but she did her best.  

Nothing in her vast knowledge told her about how to make antihistamines and she knew that they had not been invented yet. There were natural remedies but with the boy back to being unconscious she didn’t want to try any edible types.

Finally, Alexandria Copeland sat back. She looked across the bed to a very worried John Thornton.

“He should be ok in about 12 hours Mr. Thornton.”

“Dr. Copeland, what happened to my son?”

“He had a reaction to dairy products would be my best guess. Someone maybe gave him some milk or a bite of cheese, I’m not sure exactly what was given to him. We caught it in time and he should be right as rain once more.”

Thornton nodded once. “I’m staying here with him.”

“Of course. You will have no argument from me. If you would excuse me for a few moments. I need to change and do some prep work to make sure your son will rest well. If you need me, just call out. I’m not far away.”

Thornton nodded once again, staring at his son.

Alex rested her hand against his shoulder when walking past, giving it a squeeze and a pat. She thought nothing of it. The touch went against the customs of the time alas, and Thornton flinched with the touch. Not because he felt it to be inappropriate but because it was something Margaret would have done as well.

Having changed out of the dancing gown and slippers, Alex returned to where Thornton and his son were. She set up an IV for the little boy before preforming the menial tasks that went along with health care.

“May I get you some tea Mr. Thornton? Or perhaps something stronger?”

“You partake?” He was surprised, wine was suitable for a young lady but anything stronger was not in Thornton’s way of thinking.

Alex was fairly certain that John Thornton wouldn’t enjoy some of the tales from her younger years drinking, so she shook her head. “It has medicinal purposes as well, Sir. This does qualify as medicinal.”

“Thank you, but no. Dr. Copeland?”

“Please, call me Alex. Each time I hear Dr. Copeland, I look for my father.” Thornton’s ears burned red and Alex realized her faux pas. “My apologies. I stayed too long in the States. It is more relaxed there.”

“John? Dr. Copeland?” A voice called out from the foyer of the clinic.

Rising, Alex went to see who it was. “Mrs. Thornton, your son and grandson are back in the patient room. Would you like to come back?”

“Thank you Doctor.”

Alex took Hannah Thornton’s wrap and hung it up. She let the family have time alone.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

“How is Johnny doing?” Hannah Thornton asked.                

“The doctor said he will be better in about 12 hours. She thinks it is the milk again.”

“Anna admitted to giving him some warm milk to help settle Johnny down.”

Thornton looked up sharply at his mother. The maid did this? He shook his head. “You have released her from her duties then?”

“I will when I return. What else is bothering you, John?”

“ELSE? My son could have died! Your grandson almost DIED.”

“But he didn’t.”

Thornton looked away, scowling.

“It’s that doctor.” Hannah did not ask a question.

“What does the doctor have to do with anything?”

“She reminds you of Margaret. “

“That is enough Mother.”

Alexandria tapped on the doorframe. Seeing her shut down the conversation between mother and son. Bringing in a tray with tea, she put it to the side. “Please help yourselves. I am not the best hostess I’m afraid, but I need to check Johnny out again.”

Hannah fixed the tea for herself and John while Alex worked. The swelling was gone, with that Alex breathed a sigh of relief. “I’m going to seal the wound now that the swelling has gone down. He will wake up in a few hours.” Getting a kit that she had made up, Alex washed up.  Sitting on the edge of the boy’s bed, she watched and listened to his breathing.

“His throat will be very sore. If I am not in the room when he awakens, please call out for me. We need to keep him still and quiet for a while yet.”

Cleaning up, Alex excused herself once again.  She was followed a few moments later by Mrs. Thornton.

“Doctor, thank you for taking such good care of my grandson.”

“No thanks is needed Mrs. Thornton. This is my passion. I would gladly do it 100 times over.”

“John wishes to say with his son, I need to return to our home to make sure everything has been brought back to order.”

“It is not a problem ma’am. He may stay as long as he wishes.”

“Thank you Doctor.”

Alex nodded and handed the elder woman her wrap, standing silently as the woman returned to her carriage to be brought back to the mill and home.

Walking back in to the room, she found John Thornton asleep. Taking two blankets, Alex draped one over his front and the other across his shoulders, she let him rest. Sleepless nights were common for Alex, and she was fine with watching over father and son.

It was about six in the morning when the little boy started to stir. Alex tapped his nose gently and got a smile out of the boy. Pointing to where his father napped, she put a finger to her lips. When Johnny nodded, she whispered to him to stay very quiet but to shake his head for yes and nos.

Alex was quiet and careful. The little lad felt better, thankfully. His throat was very sore so she gave him a small amount of the laudanum to ease the soreness. Not wanting him to get restless, she asked if he would like to hear a story. Nodding yes, Alex began.

“T’was a dark and stormy night and all the bunnies in BunBunLand were tucked into their little beds. Bunnies big and small lay dreaming of carrots and candy whilst they slept.” She made the sounds of wind and rain while wiggling her fingers to make it more real.  The little boy climbed over her knee and sat on Alex’s lap. He was enjoying her story.

“But one little bunny was sitting under the tree, watching the wind and the rain. Do you know why that little bunny was out in the rain?” Alex smiled when Johnny shook his head. “Because he had heard that the first star after a storm to be seen would grant him the wish of all wishes. So the little bunny sat. Looking up to the sky for the rain to stop and the stars to appear. All of a sudden old hoot owl called out to the little bunny.”

“Whooooooooo are you little BunBun from BunBunLand to sit waiting in the rain? I am the one that will get the first and best wish old hoot owl! And the owl started to laugh at the little Bun and said that is not trooooooooooo! But the little Bun knew he was right and stood proud after being laughed at. He waited and waited until finally the skies started to clear and the bestest and brightest star shined in the dark sky. Right there he made his wish. And do you know what the wish was?” Johnny shook his head. “He asked for…..”

Alex looked up and saw that John Thornton was now awake and was watching her and his son silently. Tapping Johnny’s arm to get his attention, she pointed to his father. The little boy smiled happily, seeing his father so close. He scurried across the bed and to the elder John Thornton.

Standing up, Alex left the room to give the two John Thorntons some private time. It was only about twenty minutes later when the elder Thornton left the room.

“Is everything ok Mr. Thornton?”

“He started to drift off to sleep again.”

“He will do that for a couple of days. Let him rest, it is good for him.”

“Thank you Dr. Copeland.”

“For?”

Thornton sighed. “Everything. My son doesn’t take to women very well, other than my mother. I am to blame for that, I’m sure.”

“Come, sit. Let me make you something to eat and some tea.”

“You don’t need to.”

“I know. But I shall. Besides I need to break my own fast.”

Tea and porridge were served, nothing extravagant but they both tucked into the food after the long night. Where they were seated, it was easy to keep an eye on the young patient and Alex did so with a sharp eye.

“So why do you think your son isn’t fond of women and that it is your fault Mr. Thornton?”

“Because I am not comfortable around them myself.” He looked down at the now empty bowl before him. “I miss my wife.”

Alexandria looked thoughtful. “I am sure there is something to say here but I am unsure what it may be. My father once told me I treated the body and not the person. I only half believed him when he said that, but now I see that is true. I wish I could help you but I have learned not to share my thoughts on such subjects.”

“I would like to hear your thoughts doctor, if I may?”

Unconsciously, Alex chewed on the corner of her lower lip. She was trying to formulate a way of politely sharing what was in her thoughts. “Johnny is always going to look to you for how to act. He will watch and emulate you. You are his model in life. If you are uncomfortable around women, then he will grow to be so as well. Women are no different than men, I assure you. We seem different only because we have been treated that way. ”

Picking up the odds and sods basket by the desk, Alex picked up cotton, white cloth, and some string out of it. It appeared that she needed to keep her hands busy while she and Thornton spoke about a difficult subject.

“What do you mean?”

“You find me quite odd for a woman do you not Mr. Thornton?”

His ears flushed red with embarrassment. “Yes. I do find you quite odd. It’s not in a bad way. You are just different.”

“I don’t take it as an insult Mr. Thornton, I assure you. I am sure you find me odd for a variety of reasons. Not only am I female, I am in a position that is normally reserved for men. I am far too tall to be a pretty little wife but I am not unattractive. I am also extremely well educated. All this tells you I should be male in a sense but I am obviously not male. Nor am I easily controlled like many females are.” The material started to take shape in her hands.

When Thornton flushed further, Alex was fairly certain that even the tips of his toes were pink. “It’s okay Mr. Thornton. I understand. None of these differences are real, alas. They are merely made up of rules that society has placed upon us.”

“How do you know this?”

“Society changes with time. What we knew to be correct a hundred years ago is not the same as today. What we know today will be different in a hundred years.”

“You seem sure of this.”

“That is because I am very sure. We only need to look back on history to know.”

“Why haven’t you married Dr. Copeland?”

“Quite a personal question Mr. Thornton.”

“I apol – “

“No, please don’t apologize. You may ask me virtually anything you wish. I always have the right not to answer. It’s quite simple really, nobody ever interested me enough to marry. I make a far better surgeon than I do companion for any man. Plus, I am set in my ways now.”

“You would make a man a good wife I suspect and an excellent mother. I saw how you were with my son.”

“I beg to differ on the wife part.” Alex chuckled softly. “No man will tolerate the sort of hours I keep.” She even meant with her own time period. It had always been a problem when dating.

“What if you became a nurse for a well-established doctor?”

“Mr. Thornton? Would you wish to become a mill hand instead of a mill master?”

“No, I suppose that wouldn’t work for me. I see your point.”

Alex stood once again, she wanted a closer look at the sleeping lad. The bit of cloth and cotton had been transformed into a simple stuffed bunny. Laying the toy next to the child, she gently checked on him. She was glad that little Johnny Thornton was at ease.

Yet, Alex wanted to go home. Why was this taking so long? Sighing softly she turned, not realizing John Thornton was right behind her.

Alexandria would have fallen backwards if it wasn’t for Thornton catching her and holding tight. Given their nearness in height, they looked each other straight in the eye. John knew that she was pretty, even a blind man could see that. There was something different about Alexandria Copeland. What it was, he had no idea.

God! How he wished to kiss her. Right here, right now his heart ached to touch the strange woman more intimately than was appropriate.

“My apologies!” Alex swallowed hard. Her body was all of a sudden hypersensitive beneath his grip. “Thank you for catching me. Are you alright?”

“Yes.” The words sounded gruff to Thornton’s own ears.

“Thank goodness. Your mother might have my head if I had both you and your son as patients! Mr. Thornton, you may wish to go check on your mother. She is most likely worried about you and her grandson.”

“You are correct. I should.” Obviously she wished him gone, thought Thornton.

 “I will be right here with Johnny, Mr. Thornton.”

“I trust you.”

“Then go. We shall be right here when you return.”

“Thank you. I will not be gone long.” He paused, turning to look at Alex once more. “He will love the stuffed toy. “

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

                                                                                                       

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

Thornton returned a couple of hours later, he had a large basket in hand. His mother had fixed a couple of meals for him to share with his son and the lady doctor. When he walked back to the private room his son was in, little Johnny wasn’t there. A note of panic hit John Thornton’s heart. Had something happened?

The basket was dropped and Thornton vaulted quickly to the office that Alexandria Copeland used. He was wild eyed upon seeing her. His son was leaned back against the woman, sleeping. She was gently petting the little boy’s dark locks as he slept.

Alex crooked her finger, motioning Thornton closer. She whispered softly. “I am so sorry Mr. Thornton. I appear to have frightened you. Johnny had a bad dream so I have kept him in here with me. He should be able to go home tonight with you. Perhaps that way you both may get some much needed rest.”

She shifted the boy around and stood up. Thornton was somewhat surprised, the doctor was much stronger than she looked. He went to take his son from her, but she waved him off. Without effort, Alex placed him back in the hospital bed.

“Have you gotten any sleep Dr. Copeland?”

“I’m fine. Not to worry. I doze off when I can.” She smiled.

“My mother sent a basket of food, if you are hungry.”

“Actually, I am feeling a touch peckish. Let me make us some tea.” She set her desk as a table for the two of them. That way she could keep an eye on John’s son for a bit longer. The emergency was over with the boy. As long as he was kept away from dairy products, his allergy shouldn’t cause him any more problems.

John was plating their food when he looked up. Alex’s hair had slid from its careful knot. Unbinding her long curling mane, she let it slip down her back. He immediately thought of how wonderful she felt so close earlier and now seeing her with unbound hair? It was too much. She put it back up immediately. He noted that she didn’t seem to realize he could see her.

Aching, Thornton looked away. It had been a long time since he was intimate with a woman. He doubted he would ever want to be again after Margaret passed. Now, lust reared its head. He throbbed with that lust. He couldn’t help but wonder what she would look like naked before him, her body arched with his touch.

“Is everything alright Mr. Thornton?”

What? Why was she asking? “Yes. Why do you ask?”

“Oh. I thought I heard something. Never mind. I apparently am more tired than I thought.” Alex stopped to wash her hands before going to their makeshift dinner table.

“I would have you sit at a proper table Mr. Thornton, but I would rather keep an eye on your boy while he is under my care.”

“That is most appreciated Doctor. Thank you.” Thornton looked thoughtful. “At the dinner, you were saying how community is important to people. It just isn’t the money earned.”

“Yes. I was.”

“Would you explain more of this theory please?”

“A man could have all the money in the world and if he doesn’t have anything to do with said money, it’s useless. Oh sure baubles and sparkly items are nice, but items don’t love you. People love you. You have been spoken very highly of by the workers in Milton Mr. Thornton. If something were to happen, they would support and help you. Those same workers would not do the same for the likes of Watson, Slickson, or Hamper.”

“You aren’t wrong Doctor. I never thought of it that way. You have gotten to meet the three gentleman you just mentioned. What do you think of them?”

“Slickson and Hamper are dullards. Watson on the other hand is a letch.”

Nearly choking on his tea, Thornton laughed. “My you are blunt Dr. Copeland.”

“Ask me a question and I will tell you no lies.”

“Why do you say Watson is a letch?”

“While I realize he is your brother in law, he was far too friendly for my taste.” Alex didn’t have to say exactly why, Thornton understood the meaning of her words.

“I’m sorry.”

“You did nothing wrong Mr. Thornton. Please do not apologize.”

“Dr. Copeland?”

“Yes?”

“Would you permit me to court you?” There. He said it.

Alex looked stunned. It was the last thing she was expecting. Remembering how in the book Margaret’s refusal hurt the man.  “As much as I would like to say yes, I’m not sure it would be a good idea. Mr. Thornton, you do not know me at all.”

“It could be a way to get to know each other.”

“It could, yes. Mr. Thornton. I am nearly thirty years old. I have never married but I am not a virgin either.”

“I see.”

“I’m not ashamed of it, but it is something you need to know first and foremost.”

“I see.”

 

 

 

 

 


	5. Chapter 5

 

 

Six weeks later, John Thornton sat in his home speaking to the other men at his annual Masters Dinner. He hadn’t seen Alexandria Copeland since that day she admitted to him that she was not a virgin. His jealousy ran deep for the man that deflowered the pretty doctor. Part of it thrilled him. She was not a woman that would be frightened by relations. Actually, he was fairly certain that there was little that actually frightened her.

Watson, Thornton’s brother in law, said something to Hamper. “So how did you get that bruise on your cheek?”

Thornton looked over, there indeed was a dark bruise along the man’s cheek. He hadn’t noticed until now.

“One of my hands had an accident, dislocated his shoulder and broke his arm. I had to take him to the lady doctor to get fixed up.”

“My god man! He did this to you?” Slickson exclaimed. “Why did you not have him arrested?”

“No, no, no. It wasn’t the hand but that lady doctor. She is a pretty thing. I thought about setting her up in some special place.”

“Hamper, you are a bloody fool.” Thornton scowled.

“A man has to do what a man has to do!” Hamper laughed. “She turned me down right quick. So when the hand was resting from the medication she gave him, I was a bit friendlier with her. The woman didn’t take too kindly to that and let me tell you boys, she packs a mean left hook.”

It would be another two hours before the party would end. By that time, John Thornton was furious. Apparently, this was not the first time the Masters of Milton had try to compromise Alexandria’s good nature. Each one of the men had a story, save for Thornton. Even his brother in law had a tale to tell.

When the last guest left, Hannah Thornton sought out her son. “Another successful event and another year to not have to worry about it John.”

“I am thankful for that.”

“Did something happen?”

“It is nothing Mother. I think I need to take a walk.”

Hannah Thornton nodded, but said nothing. She was unsure of what had gotten into her son.

 He walked to the small house in Crampton. It was here that John Thornton had been properly introduced to Margaret. It was also here where he declared his love for her. The house was empty but well kept. He made sure of that. The only thing the house held for him now was ghosts. Not real ones, but the ones that would haunt him until his end of days.

Turning, he went to head back home. The journey took him elsewhere instead, the small clinic that was operated by Dr. Copeland.

He rapped on the door loudly, hat in hand, and waited. He could hear her running down the stairs. Thornton winced. Alexandria probably thought it was an emergency. When she threw the door open she looked startled. John Thornton was the last person she expected to see.

“Mr. Thornton! Did Johnny get into dairy again?”

“No. I wished to speak to you on a different matter. May I come in, please?”

“Yes. Of course.”

Thornton noticed her state of undress immediately. It wasn’t that the dressing grown didn’t cover as much as a dress, it was the fact it was a dressing gown. Alexandria’s hair was unbound, it flowed around her like a ripple of silk. Seeing her as such stopped him in his tracks.

He spoke with a mix of lust and jealousy. “Do you always answer the door dressed as this?”

“No. You are the first person that has come to my door long after midnight Mr. Thornton. Yet, I most certainly would answer the door as I am. I am showing less than I would on a hot summer day.”  She was testy in her reply.

“I apologize Alexandria. That was none of my business. I saw the mark you left on Hamper’s cheek. I merely wished to check on you.”

“I’m fine, I swear.”

“I’m pleased to hear that.”

She smiled. “Would you like to sit and talk? Tea?”

Alex fixed the tea while Thornton took a spot on the settee. Passing him a cup, she sat next to Thornton.

“I wanted to apologize to you.”

“For?” She looked puzzled.

“I asked to court you and when you declined, I avoided you. It was rude of me to do such.” He sighed. “Then tonight I found out about Hamper getting fresh with you, I wanted to beat him senseless.”

“No, it wasn’t rude. I understand why you were shocked.” She looked to him briefly. “I’m afraid where I have lived and Milton have different customs and etiquette. I think, too, that part of me wanted to shock you.”

“Why?” Thornton was surprised.                                                        

“If I may be my normal blunt self, Mr. Thornton. If you couldn’t handle the truth of the woman that I am, then you would have no business being near me except in the cases of medicine. I can take care of myself. I promise you that. On the other hand, I do appreciate your candor and your concern.” Oh how she wished to tell him of her circumstances but there was no way to do so without getting herself locked up for being insane.

“May I call you Alexandria?”

“Of course.”

“Will you call me by my name?”

“Yes John. If you wish.”

“I do believe you can take care of yourself, I saw the bruise you left Hamper.” Thornton smiled

She laughed.  “Alas, not one of my finer moments but it did take care of the situation.”

“Indeed it did.” Thornton smiled. “I would still like to court you Alexandria, if you would have me. We started out poorly, I would like to rectify that. I also would enjoy getting to know you better. There is something about you that I find thrilling and fascinating.”

Alex’s sharp eyes looked to the man. There was a furrow at her brow, surprised by his admission. “I enjoy your company John Thornton that is the truth. I don’t know if I could give this up, I feel like I am able to help the town of Milton.”

“I wouldn’t ask you to give up Alexandria. You _are_ a help to Milton Perhaps a change of location, would be all I would ask.”

“A change of location?”

“Yes. Perhaps something closer to the mill and our home.”

“That sounds reasonable.”

“May I ask of your reason why you wish to court me John?”

“Besides finding you fascinating and thrilling?” He chuckled when she nodded. “I have developed feelings for you Alexandria. The way you are with my son and how he is with you, I’m sure helped some. It’s more than that. I don’t laugh often these days and you have the ability to make me smile and laugh. I won’t lie either, you are an incredibly beautiful woman.”

She chewed on the corner of lower lip. If I am going to live in this dream, I might as well enjoy doing it, she thought. “Then yes, I accept your proposal.”

Leaning in, Thornton kissed her full lips. The tender kiss was almost chaste, at least to start with. Alex parted her own, permitting for it to deepen. Surprised as such, Thornton pulled her to his lap. While she straddled the tops of his thighs with arms sliding about his neck, she felt him harden. Pressing down and towards him, Alex twisted her hips to grind against his erection. She felt his groan of pleasure more than heard it. His cheeks were red with fire but he didn’t stop her.

Pulling away from the kiss, Thornton tugged at the ribbon that closed the neckline of her nightgown. He inhaled sharply. The full swells of her breasts were bared before him. Kissing the tops softly, his hand cupped one. The nipple immediately hardened through the cloth.

John Thornton swung Alexandria up and into his arms, carrying her out of the way of the windows where they could possibly be seen.  In the small bedroom, Alexandria was placed back on her feet. The dressing gown fell to the floor with a roll of her shoulders.  Carefully, the nightgown was pulled away. He gasped softly. He knew she was slender, anyone could have seen that. Yet, Alexandria wasn’t slight. Her body was well curved and she was far more muscular than he would have ever guessed. Running his hand down the slope of her bottom, he thought that he would die right here on the spot if he wasn’t able to touch her further.

Moving, Alex helped John remove his clothing. It was maddening for him. She was teasing him in ways he didn’t know was possible. They were close in height, so that gave Alexandria an advantage when brushing up against him. Removing the jacket and his cravat, she pressed her thigh rhythmically against his erection. Shoes and then pants were removed. John stood there in his undergarments while she knelt at his feet. Her cheek rubbed against his still covered cock. Until finally, he was as bare as she.

Alexandria’s touch slowed him, making him savor each brush of their bare flesh. Thornton was surprised to find that she had no inhibitions in touching him. She bit gently at his chest, teasing his nipples with her tongue. Turning, she moved him to the bed. Her body staying close in contact with his own. On his back, John Thornton curled his fingers into the bedding when she continued lower.

Alexandria whispered in his ear. “I want you. I crave you John.”

His eyes widened. This was something he had never felt before. With Margaret, he had to be so careful. Alexandria had the same urges he did. Flipping her hair out of the way, Alex’s lips touched his manhood. The kiss was brief but the trailing of her lips down his shaft wasn’t. She was so gentle that it surprised him further. Between his legs she laid, Silvery eyes watching him as she took his manhood between her lips, sucking.  He couldn’t break away from the wanton sight of her.

Even the whores he had paid for as a young man wouldn’t do this. Hips raised to meet her and thrust in. She took him all. Fingers at the base of his cock stroked gently. One hand cupped around his testicles, long nails scratching lightly at the underside as she took him further and deeper with each stroke. The vibration at the back of her throat made it all the more pleasurable.  When he knew he couldn’t keep control much longer, John pulled Alex upwards into his arms.

He kissed her lips once more, savoring the taste of her kiss. One hand cupped her breast while his thumb made lazy swirling strokes against the hard peak of her nipple.  She was divine and she was his!

John was surprised to feel the bare flesh between her legs. There was naught but a thin strip of fuzz. He had never heard of something like this before, let alone felt it. Alexandria nipped his ear feeling the surprise in him.

“I shave John. It’s not unlike what you do during your daily ablutions.”

With a gentle touch, he parted her, opening the folds of silken skin. Groaning against her throat, he was surprised how wet she was.

Turning, Alex pushed John Thornton to his back once more. Drawing herself upwards, she knelt over him. The dark curtain of silken tresses hid them from the world. With a toss of her head backwards, the mass of black silk fell behind Alexandria.

Her hand curved around his thick cock, holding it. Slowly, she impaled herself over him. Thornton didn’t know what to do but instinctively his hips rose, causing her to cry out for him. Hands grasped her hips and she gave him a smile. Ever so long legs parted, giving him a view of what they were doing.

“Watch John, watch how you affect me so.”

Hips rolled as she slid up and down his manhood. His hand stroked the fine flesh of the woman above him. Like most men, he enjoyed sex. This was wholly different. She was a siren luring him to his death and he would gladly give her his life for just one more moment of bliss.

Now, it was his turn. He moved fast, keeping her impaled. John looked at the beautiful woman beneath him. If he were to die this very night, he would die a happy man. Kissing her softly, the thrusts were powerful almost brutal in their taking. Still, she cried out with pleasure. Long legs wrapped around his waist. Thighs clenched to keep him close. The velvet wetness of her chamber was what surprised him most. She clenched him from within. It was incredible the ripple of pleasure that washed over his cock and then continued was powerful. Just when he thought he could not take anything more, Alexandria released her pleasure to wash over him. Her sweet cries calling out to him, for him were enough. He found his own release seconds later.

He went to move away but Alex shook her head. Laying his body against her’s John Thornton worried his weight would be too much for her to bear. With a delicate touch, she swept her fingers along the nape of his neck and on to his upper back. Moving her fingers back, she scratched a trail against his skin.

The look of pure satisfaction made John laugh softly. “My beautiful Alexandria, you look like a cat that has had too much crème.”

“You did provide a good amount of crème John. Alas, I am not sure what would be too much.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

                                                                                                                                                                                                               

 

 

 


	6. Chapter 6

 

 

Alex woke with a start. Lighting a candle, she checked what time it was, 3 o’clock in the morning. What time did John have to go to the mill? She never asked. Blowing out the candle, she curled back into his arms. He was sleeping so peacefully that she hated to wake him.  What about his mother and son? Would they be worried that he never came home last night?

She ducked beneath the heavy quilt, making sure that it was kept drawn up. It wouldn’t be good to wake the sleeping man with cold air. Her hand slid across the tip of his manhood. He wasn’t erect. With a gentle touch she slowly coaxed him to hardness. When John mumbled in his sleep, she stopped to let him fall back to his dreams.

Her lips found him. Drawing the tip of his cock between them, Alex began to suck gently. A swipe of her tongue around the head the quick movements beating a tattoo against the velvety flesh. John was waking now but not fully, yet. Gently she pulled away, kisses sliding down his impressive manhood. One hand stayed wrapped around the base, slowly she squeezed and slid her hand up and down. Lips brushed against his testicles. Tiny little kisses over them and under. Taking one into her mouth, Alex suckled. Her own noises of pleasure touched his skin.

A strong hand was in her hair, the tips of his fingers digging into her scalp. She took his cock fully in one sweep. Tears gathered in Alex’s eyes with him fully engorged and taken as far as she could. When she heard the gasp of breath and the slow panting, there was a smile like none other.

“Alexandria?” His voice was thick with sleep.

“Mmmmm…”

Unexpectedly, John pulled her free and up the bed. Full lips were swollen with the use from the night before and now. He had to kiss her, it felt like his life depended on it. Pinning her to the bed, his mouth sought her own. She returned the kiss with the same passion. Rolling on top of her, immediately John penetrated her deeply. Hips bucked up against his. Her body arched as she ground against him. One hand grabbed at Alex’s wrists and he held her there.

John threw his head back and growled with the exquisite pleasure of her body. Never before had he permitted his passion the freedom that it craved. Her limber body melded to his. Long legs were around his waist and heels dug into his arse. His hand still keeping her pinned, John Thornton pulled away from her mouth. His lips found the softness of her breasts and he kissed and bit at the flesh that could be reached. Finally, he secured a nipple between his teeth and bit down. He was surprised she didn’t scream when he bit so savagely. Alex, instead, purred with pleasure.

She did instead cry out when he pulled free from that velvet wet sheath. Shoving her to her belly John took her from behind. The sound of his body slapping against her wetness drove him to distraction. Hands slid beneath her body to cup and tease her breasts.

She swung back with her body and met those same thrusts. Groaning, John kissed and bit at Alex’s shoulder. It was almost too much for both of them to take. In an instant, Alex stilled. A powerful shudder made her body clench around him. He relished in the pleasure she took and gave in return. Soft voice called his name over and over again. He kept thrusting in, forcing past the clenching muscle until his own pleasure was claimed.

This time he stayed connected to her, keeping his weight to his forearms. Alexandria laughed softly, sweetly while lifting her bottom up to press against him. John swatted her thigh playfully.

“Incorrigible!”

“I cannot disagree with you John Thornton.”

Rolling to his side, he laughed. Alexandria turned to face him, giving a gentle kiss.

“You couldn’t wait until the sun was on the horizon?” John smiled gently, letting her know that he was merely teasing.

“I didn’t know when you needed to be at the mill.”

“Today is Sunday my Alexandria. We don’t run the mills on Sunday.”

Blushing brightly she ducked her head. John was having none of that. He placed a single fingertip beneath her chin and brought her eyes to his. “You never need to look away from me. Ever.”

“I also thought that your mother may be concerned.”

“You are most likely correct. She would be.” He sighed and started to get dressed.  “Alexandria would you sit with us at church this morning?”

“I, uhm. I haven’t been to church in Milton yet John. My Sundays are usually spent here with people needing help.” It was partially true. Sundays actually didn’t get busy until after tea.

“Will you come with us?”

“Yes, John. I shall. It will be a lovely day. I admire your mother and I will get to see Johnny, yes?”

“Yes, you will. The coach will pick you up at eight.”

“Thank you.”

Still undressed, Alex went to grab for her nightgown. John stopped her before she could continue. His large rough hand touched her cheek gently. “Until then my Alexandria.” One kiss later and he was gone.

 The house was dark when John arrived. He barred the back door and locked it. The staircase was taken quietly. When John Thornton started to pass through the parlor on the way to his rooms, he was startled by his mother still awake and waiting.

“John, are you okay?”

He kissed mother’s cheek before walking over to his chair. Thornton sat down heavily and smiled.

“Everything is quite well Mother. Quite well indeed.”

“Where did you go John?”

“At first over to the Hale’s home in Crampton. Then I went to the clinic.”

Hannah Thornton knew that he visited the home in Crampton but hearing he went to the clinic surprised her. “Are you ill son?”

“Not at all. Did you see the bruise on Hamper’s cheek?”

“It would have been hard not to notice.” Hannah said wryly.

“Dr. Copeland did that to him.”

“For whatever reason?!”

“He tried to get fresh with her. When she declined his offer he tried to force the issue.”

“What a vile man!” Hannah was shocked. “Is Dr. Copeland hurt?”

“From what I could tell, no. She apparently has quite the nasty left hook according to Hamper.” John chuckled. “Mother, I asked Alexandria’s permission to court her. She said yes.”

Once more Hannah Thornton was shocked. Normally John would have consulted her on such matters. “Do you love her John?”

“Yes. Yes I do Mother. I do not know if her feelings for me run as deep as my own, but I do know she has feelings for me.”

“She said so?”

“Yes, she did.”

“I know that Margaret and I didn’t get along overly well.” Hannah started slowly. “Dr. Copeland seems to be an intelligent woman with a good head on her shoulders. I find her interesting and strong.”

John Thornton smiled crookedly at her. “She loves Johnny and admires you. What more can I ask for?”

“You need a woman for you as well, not just us my boy.”

“I have that with her. She makes me laugh again and smile. Alexandria Copeland is unlike any woman I have ever met.”

The Thornton clan arrived exactly on time. Alexandria Copeland was met by John Thornton at the door. When she tucked her hand around his arm, Alex blushed brightly.

“Good morning Mr. Thornton. You seem well rested this fine morning.”

“A bright and sunny good morning to you as well Dr. Copeland. You are a picture of loveliness.”

He helped her up into the cab of the coach. His son hadn’t realized that they would have someone joining them this morning.

“Dr. Alex!” Johnny rushed into her arms making Alexandria laugh happily. She kissed his cheek.

“Why young Master Thornton what a surprise this is!”

John sat next to his mother and watched Alex with his son. His heart swelled with happiness.

“Good morning Mrs. Thornton. It’s a pleasure to see you under much better circumstances for a change.”

The chatter was warm and light as the turned to head to the church. John exited the cab first with his son, then helped his mother out. Holding Johnny at his hip, he offered a hand to Alexandria. She noticed that little Johnny did the same. Taking the boy’s hand, she exited the cab.

A rumble of laughter left Thornton’s lips. He was pleased to see how she cared for his family. For propriety sake, Alex sat between Hannah and Johnny. She had no idea how many people stared at her with the Thornton’s.

A few of the church goers stopped and asked Alexandria for advice. She answered them as she always did, warmly and calmly. She and John had planned on taking a walk after church, just the two of them. Though he did not complain, Johnny Thornton looked sad that he was not invited to go. Soft words from Alex told John that she wouldn’t mind if his son went with them. He thought about it for a few moments and agreed. If Alexandria was to become his wife, she would be the mother of his son.

None of them saw the glares that were given as they walked away.

Johnny held one of Alex’s gloved hands and the other was tucked against John’s arm.

“Where are we going?”

“There are no great parks here in Milton that we may go, but there is a grassy hill far above the smoke of the town.”

“I rather like the smoke of the town. After all, I did find you there.” Alex wished she could lay her head against his broad shoulder, but if anyone saw, she didn’t want to deal with the nonsense.

“Alexandria?”

“Yes?”

“Marry me.”

“I thought we were already courting John?” She looked puzzled.

“We are.” He ran his hands through his hair, trying to think of what to say. “I love you. I want you in our home. Sharing our lives. I want you with me for always.”

With Alex’s head turned towards him, she didn’t see Johnny come running up to her. Alex felt the impact and started to laugh. She bounced the boy high on her knee.

“John Thornton II!” His father growled. John was angry that his son interrupted the moment.”

The little boy’s face crumpled, but he did not cry. “I’m sorry Father.”

“Johnny, will you go pick me a bouquet of posies please?”

“Really??”

“Yes really.” Alexandria watched the boy run and pick the flowers as asked.

“I will marry you John Thornton but on one condition.”

“What is that condition?” Fear licked at his belly.

“Your son doesn’t mind.”

“He has loved you from the moment he saw you, as have I.”

Within minutes the younger John Thornton came running back. His hands clutched the flowers he had picked.  He blushed when he gave them to Alex. She tipped her head forward, inhaling the scent. Taking two flowers from the bunch she placed one each in both father and son’s lapels.

Needing to get back to the clinic, Alex rose. Her hand was tucked against John’s arm once again and Johnny held her other hand. Smiling at father and son, she was happy. Alexandria was becoming part of Milton and the lives of its people. The desire to go back to her own reality was forgotten.

“Imagine, being escorted by the two most handsome gentlemen in all of England. I am a lucky woman.” Alex bit her lip to keep from giggling as father and son sported the same blush.

John arranged for the reading of the bahns and the marriage certificate the following week. Hannah Thornton, with the help of Alexandria, planned the wedding and the wedding breakfast. The last item on the list was a wedding dress.

With even more help from Hannah Thornton, Alex found one she liked. The dress was simple but the bodice had fine silver stitching. It would match the bride’s eyes perfectly. The seamstress was pinning the dress to make the small changes that were needed for the dress to fit. A layer of silvery silk had to be added to the hem so that it would a proper length to fit.

Alex had just changed back into her day dress when she heard the voices. Two women were in the front of the draper’s shop talking.

“Fanny, I cannot believe your brother is marrying that woman.” Catherine Hamper said in a mock whisper. “You know she tried to bed my father. When he refused she assaulted him!”

“I am so sorry Cate. I don’t know what has gotten into John’s head! He should be marrying a respectable girl that is of his station, like you.”

“She works. Rumor has it that he will continue to work after they wed.” Cate spoke with distaste.

Fanny Thornton Watson shook her head. “She is so far beneath my brother, I cannot imagine what he sees in her. I wouldn’t stop for a woman that low on the streets.”

Hannah Thornton was embarrassed by her daughter’s words. She started to go to the front of the shop when Alexandria stopped her.

“Please Mrs. Thornton, I am perfectly capable of handling this myself.”

Stepping out of the back, Alex held her head high.

“You understand ladies, when you wish to speak ill of someone, you should check your audience fully.” Her smile was frosty. “Alas, you are correct. I am beneath John’s station. He is a good man. John Thornton is far above any I have known, save my own father. With my father, he is on equal ground. However, I am far, far, far above either of your stations.  You both bray like bored donkeys in an empty field. You bray about matters neither of you know anything about. Good day.”

Instantly, Hannah Thornton knew that Dr. Alexandria Copeland was a perfect match for her son. Walking out, she gave Fanny a look of warning.

“I will be proud to call you my daughter Alexandria.” Hannah gave her a slight smile.

“I have been delighted to know you Mrs. Thornton. I will be proud to call you Mother.”

 

 

 

                                                                                                       

 

 

 

 

 

 

                                                                                                                        


	7. Chapter 7

The wedding had been beautiful. Since Alexandria needed someone to give her away, Johnny Thornton did it. She was positive that there would be some talk, but didn’t care. She loved the little boy dearly and his was just as important to her as his father was. The breakfast was a delight to everyone that attended. Once tea was over, John and Alexandria Thornton had excused themselves for the evening.

One of the maids helped Alexandria remove the gown and unpin her hair. The maid noted with some interest that Alex wasn’t the least bit nervous.  Perhaps that was because the woman was a doctor the maid considered. Perhaps there was another reason.

“Is the bath and candles ready in the other room?”

“Yes Mrs. Thornton, it is.”

After helping the new bride into a nightgown and dressing gown, the maid was excused. Immediately, the gowns were removed, propriety be damned. Alex had procured one of John’s shirts without his knowledge. She slid it on with nothing beneath it. The buttons were left undone until right below her breasts.

In his bedroom, John was agitated. He had wanted to go to Alex immediately. They had already shared a bed together, so why was it taking so long? In his state, he didn’t hear the door open.

Leaning against the door frame was Alex, watching him. The shirt barely covered her sex as she stood there. When Thornton turned around he was startled.

With Alex’s fair skin and long jet curling hair she looked exotic, even more so when she raised her eyes to meet his gaze. She smiled ever so slightly. He went to her immediately.

John was speechless. Never in his life had he seen a woman so erotic. Immediately, he drew her into his arms. The shirt lifted up just enough to expose the rounded curve of Alex’s buttocks. He cupped his hands around her buttocks and squeezed gently.  A sweet kiss found his lips and then she whispered softly in his ear.

“Mr. Thornton? Would you come with me please?”

“And where are we going Mrs. Thornton?”

“You shall see.”

The three rooms were connected. The master bedroom, her dressing room, and what had once been a nursery. Most all of the furniture had been removed from what was the nursery. The little that was left were covered in candles. A small table sat by the copper tub. Upon the table were several items, all hidden beneath a heavy cloth.

John turned, looking to his wife quizzically. She stepped behind him, delicate hands on his waist. Undoing the tie of his dressing gown, Alexandria slowly slid the cloth away from her husband’s shoulders.

“Would you like to take a seat in the tub please Mr. Thornton?”

Puzzled at her antics, he did as she asked. Alexandria made a show of removing the shirt. Slipping into the tub, the shirttail stuck to her now wet skin. Alex then straddled John’s thighs. His wet hands wandered across her breasts, making the soft muslin show her erect nipples. John groaned, his cock had become painfully hard. Reaching, he cupped his hands around her bottom. His rough fingers stroked against the tight star. Alex pushed back to the seeking fingers, but he pulled away. Lips found her throat, biting and kissing. The wet shirt, clinging to her skin, was transparent. Rising slightly, Alexandria pressed her sex against his erection.  Without thinking John’s strong hands tore the shirt away from her. His mouth quickly found a taut nipple while his fingers found the other. Pulling back slightly, she flashed a wicked grin.

“Not yet my husband, not yet.”

A groan was the only response John could give.

The hot water sloshed some as she sat behind him. Alexandria’s touch was gentle, urging him to lean back against her.

“I never knew that a bath could feel this divine.”

“Oh my love, I plan on teaching you a great many new sensations.”

Taking care of him in a different way was her idea. Wetting her fingers with just a drop of oil from the table, she began massaging John’s temples. With his eyes closed he hummed a soft note of pleasure. Gently, she massaged his handsome face and through his thick black hair. Only adding a bit more oil when she reached the back of his neck. This oil was different. There was just a trace of peppermint to it.

With strong hands, she went down each of his arms one at a time. The palms she took more time with. Alexandria was rewarded with groans of pleasure. Moving back up, she took to his back. Working out the stiff muscles and knots.

“How did you learn this?”

“I’m a doctor. Human anatomy is my specialty.” The words were breathy against his ear. To the front of him she worked as well. Making sure his strong broad chest and flat abdomen were well relaxed beneath her touch. Alex had to move to take care of his legs and feet but she did so seamlessly.

Back behind her husband once more, she switched gears. Beneath the water his erection bobbed.  A hand on either side of his cock she rubbed her palms against it. John arched up, pressing to her hands. She touched him like no one had ever before. One hand curved around his shaft while the other, freshly oiled, slid around the head. She stroked him, squeezed him, and kept the hand around the thick cockhead moving.

John’s breaths were coming in short gasps now. “Alexandria, you must stop. I cannot take much more.”

Nipping his ear. She whispered again. “No. I won’t stop. This is for you my beloved. This is all for you.”

He bucked up into her hands John’s eyes widened with the oncoming release. She squeezed just a bit tighter while her hand ran up and down the length of him. He tried to hold back, oh Lord how he tried, but nature took his course. He released the heady pleasure on to her skin and leaned back against her.

Arms went around his waist, holding him tight. Propping her chin upon his shoulder, she smiled with delight. “I love you John. I know you have been working hard of late and I wanted to do something just for you.”

Without thinking, John took Alex’s hand in his. Placing her palm against his chest, she could feel his heart beating. “You are my love, my heart. I love you Alexandria.”

They laid in the hot water for a while longer, neither speaking. Alexandria slid her hands over his chest, lulling him into a peaceful calm.

John reflected on his life. He was not dealt an easy hand, but it didn’t bother him. Well, it didn’t bother him until he met Margaret. Oh how he loved her! Even when he felt he should hate her, he loved her all the same. That fateful day at the train station, her coming home with him. He had 18 months of love.

When Margaret died in childbirth, he thought he would go with her. In many ways John wanted to. If it wasn’t the fact that his son needed care, he may have done the deed. The last four years had been so lonely. He would never seek another women. There was no way John could face that heartbreak again.

He admitted to himself, he was furious when he found the new doctor to be female. John also knew part of that fury was because he was immediately attracted to her.  What sane man wouldn’t have been? She was beautiful. As he got to know her, it wasn’t just her beauty that intrigued him. She was brilliant, kind, and had such a generous soul. Just as he felt that he could never have Margaret, he assumed that Alexandria was the same.

“The water is beginning to cool. Would you like to retire to your bed chambers?”

“Our bed chambers now my wife.”

Alexandria smiled and nodded her head. She stepped out first and offered a hand to him.

“Tis I that should be taking care of you.” John looked at her with a gentle smile.

“Well that comes next…”  She looked ever so cheeky.

Taking one of the large drying cloths, Alex carefully dried John and helped him back into his dressing gown. She dried herself off quickly yet didn’t bother with his ruined discarded shirt. The candles were blown out and before Alexandria could move, John swept her up into his arms. Laughing with delight, she kissed his mouth.

John Thornton took his new bride directly to bed. It was the one place they could be together and be themselves in private. With a certain reverence, he touched Alexandria’s skin gently. It was as if he could hardly believe she was there with him. He needed to know every part of her.

Caressing her cheek, he kissed her once more. His large hand was gentle as it swept down her back and over the curve of her bum. Pressing tighter to him. Alex slid a long leg over his hip. It left way for the tip of his cock to brush against her wet sex. Neither tried to force the contact but it was getting more and more difficult to not consummate their marriage bed.

This time, he pressed into her slowly, deliberately so. Head tipped back and Alex luxuriated in the feel of him. With John above her, they both moved as one. Nails bit into his back as hips rose to meet his thrusts.  Kisses covered the side of her throat and when John couldn’t take any more, hit bit the flesh there. Slipping down some, Alexandria kissed his broad chest. Her lips finding the rosy nipples. Her sucking and nipping make John groan. They made love, not rushing any part of it, for hours.

The sun was starting to rise when they fell asleep in each other’s arms, spent.

They both woke about mid-morning. Alexandria stretched languidly, pressing into John. She started to rise so that they may break their fast.

“I have never met another woman such as you.”

“You most likely never will again.”

“Oh??”

“Of course. I have to keep you from the wanton ways of other women.”

John rolled his eyes and grabbed Alexandria around the waist, pulling her back to him.

“And where do you think you are going Mrs. Thornton?”

“Are you not hungry John?”

“Famished. I thought ahead my love.”

Rising, John went to pick up a basket. He had had the cook pack a morning meal for them. Alex was on her belly, legs up while bent at the knee. She was admiring his backside with a grin.

“Cat got your tongue?”

“You have no idea how handsome you are do you John?”

He blushed brightly and shook his head. “I am just a big rough Mill Master.”

Sliding off the bed, Alex pushed him gently onto a chair. She climbed on his lap, naked. Looking into his blue eyes, she smiled softly.

“John, you are not –just- anything. You are a Mill Master, yes.” Wiggling her bum against his lap she grinned. “You are quite big, yes. “ She laughed when he blushed brighter. “You are never just something. You are my love, my husband. You are my life. I have never wanted or needed a man before, until you.”

“Witch! You have bespelled me. Not that I wish to complain.” He smiled, looking into her silvery eyes.

“Would you like to eat?”

“Yes, but not food.”

Rising, John tossed Alexandria over his shoulder. Her long hair nearly brushed the floor as he carried her back to their bed. Flipping her slender body over, she landed in the center. John was like a panther stalking its prey. Slowly he climbed up the bed. Teasing her, he tickled the bottoms of her feet. Alex squealed and tried to draw her legs away but he would not allow it. From the tips of her toes, he kissed each leg ending at the curve of her hipbones. Over from one and down to the other, his lips tasted her soft skin. Finally, when he could no longer stand the teasing, he dipped between her parted thighs.

A single fingertip drew down the seam, parting her slowly.  Ready, Alexandria was swollen and wet. He parted her further and bent his head, kissing her there. His tongue slipped inwards, it was enough to make Alexandria shiver with the sweet pleasure of delight. His hands moved to her thighs, spreading her further. Nosing in deeper, he inhaled the warm scent of her femaleness. A digit slid inside the velvet tunnel, then a second. His suckled gently upon her pearl while his fingers dove in and out faster and faster. It didn’t take long until Alex cried out his name over and over, pleading with him to stop. It was just too much for her. Unrelenting, John continued until she came again and again.

Then and only then, did he take her. His body over her own. His hips ground hers down further while she still quivered around him. Finally, when her body started to buck up into his own and she came once again, he allowed his seed to spill within her.

“I didn’t realize that women could enjoy coupling as much as men.” John stroked his fingers through her hair, musing.

With her cheek against his chest, she smiled softly. She forgot how different her life and this dream life she lived now were. “I’m surprised that your mother or Johnny hasn’t been up here to check to make sure we are still amongst the living.”

“Mother took Johnny to Fanny’s for a couple of days so we may have some private time.”

“That was very generous of her.” Alex smiled.

“Are you certain you do not wish for a wedding vacation?”

“Yes, I am sure. We have a lot of things going on currently. We can take one next year for our anniversary.”

“We will have to see. You may be ready to expand our family then.”

Alex was about to ask what John meant when it dawned on her. He was talking about her being pregnant. That was something she never took into consideration. Fuck.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	8. Chapter 8

The days turned into weeks. The weeks quickly turned into months. Alexandria and John’s marriage was a happy one. Thoughts of home rarely crossed her mind. Perhaps she was in a coma Alex mused, but this was her reality now and she was happy. Johnny was growing by leaps and bounds. Unlike many of the parents of the upper class, Johnny was raised by his parents with help from his grandmother. They didn’t hire out a nanny for him. The rumors that floated around were that the Thornton’s lacked the funds. That wasn’t true in the least. Alexandria enjoyed having the boy around and made sure he knew he was very much loved.

While she and John both worked, Johnny met with some tutors. Alex also tutored him in areas that he wouldn’t have access to in his lifetime.

It was a dreary and cold Thursday morning and the chatter of the workers had upset Alex. Apparently Fanny Watson nee Thornton had been seen in town yesterday. She was looking ragged and worn, sickly even. If the workers noticed, that meant others would have too.

Frowning, she told the girl that worked as her nurse, Annabelle, that she would be gone for a while. If she was needed send word to the Watson’s home. Taking her medical bag, she went to get her coat from the house.

Hannah Thornton was doing some mending when she saw Alexandria come in.

“Alexandria! Is anything wrong?”

Hesitating, Alex sighed. She answered truthfully. “I am not sure. I have heard some reports that Fanny is ill and I wished to check on her. I just needed my coat.”

Hannah stood at once. “Very well. I shall accompany you then.”

“Mother Thornton, there is no – “ The words fell away from Alex’s lips. Realizing that if it had been Johnny in a similar situation nothing would have kept her away.

“Does John know?”

“Not to my knowledge. I didn’t want to worry him if it was nothing.”

“Smart girl.”

The pair took a cab over to the Watson home. Neither woman wished to wait for the coach to be brought around. Paying handsomely for the carriage, the driver was to stay there until they said otherwise. There was a sinking feeling in Alex’s stomach. When the door wasn’t answered, she shrugged at her mother-in-law and let them in herself.

The house was a mess. Neither Alexandria nor Hannah cared for the overly ornate style that Fanny kept her home in, but it was never a mess. Hannah called out several time for her daughter and son-in-law. There was an eerie silence in the air. There wasn’t the sounds of servants even.

Finally, Alexandria found proof of life in the office of Mr. Watson. He was passed out drunk. His face covered in scratches was a surprise, but the bruised and bloody knuckles even more so. Casting a glance around, Alex found Fanny hiding in a corner. Finger to her lips, she motioned for Hannah to stay silent. Hand over Fanny’s mouth she woke the battered woman. Shushing her the same way, Alex helped Fanny up.

“Mother, get Fanny outside and into the cab please? I will be behind you shortly.”

Heading upstairs and to Fanny’s quarters, Alex didn’t bother with clothing. Instead, she packed up anything of worth, such as jewelry. Heading into Watson’s quarters she did the same thing. She didn’t know what financial situation Watson was in but Alex was going to protect Fanny as best she knew.The carpet bag was heavy as Alexandria came down the stairs. She heard before actually seeing Watson standing in the doorway of his office bellowing out Fanny’s name.

“She’s gone Mr. Watson. I have seen to that.”

“You sow!” He swung around at the sound of Alexandria’s voice, nearly falling over.

Alexandria had fixed up many women and children in her years as a surgeon due to abuse. This was nothing new to her. She kept walking. Unsteadily, Watson tried to grab her and managed to grasp Alex’s shoulder.

He pulled her back and fired a shot of his fist against her cheek.  It would leave a mark, but she simply smashed the heel of her hand against the bridge of his nose. Feeling the snap and watching the drunken man fall, she kept walking to the waiting cab.

Alexandria looked perfectly calm as she climbed back in with her mother-in-law and sister-in-law. Truthfully, she was anything but. While she would never call herself and Fanny friends, she also didn’t want anything to happen to the woman.

“Mother Thornton? I will get Fanny into the clinic where I can care for her. Would you please get John?”

Hannah, frowning, nodded.

When they were almost to the mill, Alex took off her coat and wrapped it around Fanny. She pulled the hood up to hide her from prying eyes. It took a bit of time, but finally she got Fanny and the bag out and helped Mrs. Thornton as well. Giving a pat to the horses, Alex paid for the driver’s services.

Taking Fanny to one of the private rooms, she set the bag of valuables down. The other bag, Hannah Thornton had.

“Annabelle? Bring me a lady’s gown and dressing gown please?”

The girl brought both immediately while Alex herself was warming water. Two large bowls of hot water and dozens of cloths, Alexandria sat down with Fanny and began to clean her up to survey the damage. It was worse than she ever thought. Apparently Watson had been beating the younger woman for months. At first it was done so it wouldn’t show. Sometime later he forgot caring about hiding the bruises and hit her as he felt.

Turning at the knock on the door, she asked softly. “Who is it?”

“It’s me.”

John. She nodded. He didn’t need to see this. “I’ll be right out.”

Alex slid out and sent Annabelle in. Neither mother nor brother needed to see the full extent of what Fanny had endured.

“Annabelle we will be in my office if you need us.”

Hearing the yes Doctor, she motioned Hannah and John in. Leaning back against the desk, Alexandria sighed with resignation.

“It’s bad. It’s very bad.”

“What do you mean Alexandria?” John asked softly.

“There isn’t hardly a spot on her that isn’t bruised.”

Standing up abruptly, Thornton scowled. “I’ll bloody well kill him!”

Hannah started to weep. Sitting next to her mother-in-law, Alex wrapped her arms around her. “John, please calm down.”

“You expect me to be calm?!”

“I expect you not to get yourself in trouble with the law. You are a magistrate after all. When we left, Watson was unconscious.”

“Did he drink himself to death?” The words were quiet in Thornton’s anger.

“No. Not that I know of. I broke his nose after he hit me.”

John saw it then. Alex had kept her head turned so as he would not notice the bruise. Down the side of her face, from hairline to jaw, there was a dark forming bruise. He reached to touch it gently. When Alex didn’t flinch, his heart ached. So much made sense all of a sudden.

“I need to get back with Fanny.” She took her leave of the pair.

Alex finished tending to the cuts, bruises and burns, yet Fanny was still in shock. So she set about another exam, fearing the worst. It was the worst that she found. Fanny was bleeding internally. From the bruising pattern, she was guessing the spleen but without a CT scan she had no way of being positive. Alex also was afraid that she was pregnant and very unsure of the fetus was still living. Fanny was so weak, that she didn’t have a chance of surviving the blood loss let alone the surgery.

Fanny Thornton succumbed to her injuries within 36 hours of being brought to the clinic. It was less than two days later than her husband died as well. John was furious with Alexandria that she wouldn’t allow him to be present, as was his right as magistrate, to either of the autopsies. Fanny indeed was pregnant, but appeared to have lost the baby before she had been brought back to Marlborough Mills. She died as a result of her injuries and infection.

Watson, on the other hand, had died of liver failure. Apparently, his drinking had been a long hidden secret. The one bit of revenge John had was to not pay for the funeral of his brother-in-law. Watson, once a very wealthy man, was buried in a pauper’s grave. Fanny was buried in the family plot.

After the funeral, John’s anger kept lashing out at Alexandria. She let him rant and rave until he was spent. She knew the reason behind his anger. John had permitted Watson to marry his sister. He blamed himself for her death.

Their last row had been so horrible that Alex spent the next two nights in the clinic. Her heart was heavy. It wasn’t for herself. She wasn’t even angry over John’s behavior, but enough was enough.

Telling Hannah Thornton of the plan, so that John would be surprised AND to keep her and Johnny out of the battle, was her first step. She gathered up a few items that she may need, and waited.

The master chambers of the Thornton household was dark and quiet. Only a fire had been lit. Alexandria kept to the shadows. She was behind and to the side of her husband when he lit a candle. Locking the door behind him, she stood there. Her lovely face was etched with defiance and her arms were crossed at her chest. Alex knew that John would never raise a hand to her, even if he did – she could take him down easily. John wasn’t a brawler, but she was.

Predictably, he started to pick a fight with her over some nonsense reason.

“Are you done?”

“What sort of question is that Alexandria?”

“Are you bloody well done beating me up so you can beat some sense into your own head?”

“Leave this room Alexandria. You need not be here.”

“Really? I don’t need to be near my husband? In my own bedchamber? Since when?”

The scowl on Thornton’s face would have frightened anyone else. Alex was too angry with him to be frightened.

“Yes, your sister is dead. We all know this. We all also know that you are beating yourself up over it because you are the one that permitted the marriage John.”

If he was a different man, her words would have brought him to violence. Instead he turned to the door to leave.

“Not so fast Thornton. I have the key.” Alex dangled it from her fingertips. “We finish this here and now.”

“Let me out Alexandria.”

“I decline.” He was only an inch or so taller than she and Alex used the height to her advantage. “You want to take this out on someone? Take it out on me. Believe me John, I will go round for round with you in a fight. Show me what sort of man you are. You want to beat the hell out of someone? Well, that someone will have to be me.”

John shoved her and shoved her hard, trying to get at the key. She managed to keep it away.

“You want to believe this is your fault so badly that you are forgetting one very important thing. You are not at fault. The fault lies SOLELY on Watson for being a foul man. But what happened has NOTHING to do with you.”

He pushed her again. Trying to make her back down. Alex wasn’t the sort that backed down. Ever.

“You saw it in me John Thornton. When you reached for my cheek, I didn’t flinch away. That is how I lost my virginity to a man I loved.  He was a good man, until he wasn’t. When he died of that brain tumor, I was heartbroken. The tumor changed him. I didn’t stop loving him even though he took my virginity without me wanting to give it up. Alcohol was Watson’s tumor. It changed him. It didn’t change that Fanny loved him. If you want what happened to change you, by all means that is your choice. It won’t make me stop loving you. No matter how hard you try to push me away.”

John Thornton fell to his knees, his face in his hands. The anguished cry unleashed was enough to make Alexandria wince. He stayed like that, sobbing. She sat on the floor, arms around him and just let him sob. She knew her husband well. It wasn’t just Fanny he cried for. He mourned for his life. The death of a father, having to be the head of a family and work so hard at such a young age. The near loss of his beloved mill, the loss of Margaret. Now learning the truth about Alexandria, it tore something in him even further. He had always had to be so strong, in so many different ways. He was never permitted to show what he considered weakness.

Saying nothing, Alex stroked her hand through his hair and caresses his strong back. Finally, he quieted. Still she spoke not a word. With his head in her lap, John fell into a deep sleep.

Hours had passed. The fire was out and so was the candles when John woke once more.

“Alexandria?”

She moved her hand, as it was still in his hair. “I’m right here John.”

“You’ve been right here this entire time?”

“Yes.”

“I’m so very sorry.” His voice sounded mournful.

“Don’t.”

“I hurt you.”

“You hurt yourself more my beloved.”

“But…”

“I love you John Thornton. You will be very hard pressed to change that. I would say it is impossible to change even.”

He stood, pulling Alex up with him. John buried his face against her neck, breathing in her scent. He wanted nothing more to take his wife to their bed and hold her tight. After preparing the fire for the night, that’s just what he did.

 

 

 

 

 


	9. Chapter 9

The heavy wet snow kept most everyone inside after church one Sunday. John was sitting reading a book, Hannah Thornton was working on needlepoint, and Alexandria and Johnny were sitting by John’s feet stringing popcorn together for the Christmas tree.

“Mama?”

“Yes my boy?”

“May we go work on Christmas presents when we are done with the popcorn?”

“But of course.”

“Thank you.”

John and his mother shared a smile, watching Alexandria and Johnny. While both Hannah and John were welcome to share in the creating of the festivities, Johnny had asked his father to allow him and his new mum to do most of it. It would be their first family Christmas.

Pine cones and pine boughs were set up around the home, tied with ribbons of red and gold. Baskets of oranges pierced with clove were also found. Johnny and Alex made wreaths for the doors. She taught him how to sew so they made little ornaments for the tree.

Having started making items months ago, there was a pile of wrapped presents for the mill hands and their children. Quilts, cold weather wear, little toys, were wrapped and color coded for ages. On Christmas Eve, the entire mill and their families would be fed a hearty luncheon and paid for a full day of work.

Johnny made his grandmother lavender sachets and helped Alex wrap them. For his father, who was always reading, Johnny learned to make paper. With Alex’s helping hand the pieces were trimmed and bound. Johnny wrote stories for his father in his careful penmanship.

As it was almost time for supper, John went to tell Alexandria that they needed to finish up. He heard their conversation from around the corner. Hannah, wondering what was taking the rest of the family so long, went after her son. He stopped his mother to listen.

“Mama, what do you want for Christmas?”

“I want for nothing. I have my son, you. I have my husband, your father. I have my mother, Mother Thornton.” The smile that curved a pretty mouth upwards told the rest of the story, what Alexandria said was genuine.

The five year old looked at her quizzically. “Am I really your son?”

“What do you mean Johnny?”

“I didn’t come from your belly. So are you really my mama?”

Alex picked the boy up and sat him on her lap. Kissing the top of his head, she smiled. “You are correct. You didn’t come from my belly, but as long as you want me to be your mama, I will be. I love you with all my heart John Thornton. To me, you will always be my son.”

Johnny turned around and threw his arms around Alexandria’s neck. She hugged him tight. Trying to hide her own tears, she suggested they start to pick up. It would be dinner time soon.

Neither John nor Hannah Thornton wished to interrupt the private moment that they witnessed. Mother and son went back to the sitting room and waited for Alex and Johnny.

Dinner was a quiet but happy occasion. When finished, once again they retired to the sitting room. Hannah read a Christmas tale to the family. Seeing Johnny start to yawn towards the end of the story, both his Mother and Father tucked him in with a short tale told from Alexandria’s heart.  

The three adults basked in the warm glow of the fire. While snow still fell outside, they were warm and content with each other’s company. Hannah Thornton looked to her son and daughter-in-law. They were both were relaxed in each other’s company and with her. She mused about John’s first wife.

The pain that Margaret Hale caused John was hard to forget. They had never been close because of it. It wasn’t that she disliked Margaret once she and John married. Hannah never trusted the young woman because of the hurt she caused John with her silly notions. Hannah acknowledged that it was her own bias against the girl. While Alexandria carried herself in a similar fashion, appearing haughty and aloof. The two women were completely different. Margaret was very much a lady. She wasn’t afraid of work, but it wasn’t part of her nature to work. It was something she had to learn. Alexandria had a work ethic that was not dissimilar to what Hannah instilled in John.

Maybe it was because that John and Alexandria were older, Hannah wasn’t sure. Alexandria had the strange desire to make people’s lives better that Margaret had. Yet, it was very different in how the women proceeded to do so. Alexandria was more concerned with teaching a person to do for themselves rather than doing it for them. Hannah wasn’t pleased with her comparison of the two women. It wasn’t fair to her living daughter-in-law, even when it was in Alexandria’s favor.

Hannah Thornton enjoyed Alexandria’s company. She didn’t worry over silly or selfish things that Margaret often did. Margaret was often an uninformed silly slip of a girl. Alexandria was not only intelligent, but wise.

Shaking the thought away, the servants were called for the nightly prayer. When prayers were done, John and Alex bade Hannah a good night with each giving her a kiss on the cheek.

“Shall we retire as well my love?” John smiled at his wife.

“Yes, I rather like that idea.”

Walking together to their bed chambers, Alexandria no longer asked for a maid to help her undress. John took upon that duty himself, of course she was more than happy to reciprocate. John pulled her tight to him before Alex had a chance to help him disrobe. Large hands cupped the roundness of her bottom, squeezing. His fingers danced up and down the groove, teasing against the tight star.

“You do like teasing me there.” A soft chuckled was but a whisper.

“Where love?”

When his fingers slid across it again, she pushed back against his hands. “Right. There.”

“Alexandria!”

“You have never thought of it?”

“Of course not!”

“Why?”

She began to remove his clothing, going ever so slowly.

“Mmmmm now you are, aren’t you? Thinking how good it would feel. It would be so nice and tight.”

“Alexandria Thornton.” John’s voice held a warning.

She bit gently at his bare chest. Her hand cupped around his cock, feeling how he was already hard.

“You are thinking about it. You are hard as a rock. Possibly harder.”

Lips brushed against a stern brow. With breasts crushed against a broad chest, a delicate hand stroked against the throbbing erection. Pulling away suddenly, she walked over to his grooming kit. Ever step she took, she made certain that his eyes were on her backside.  A bottle of oil, John occasionally used in his hair, was then placed in his hand.

“No. Alexandria. This is immoral, sinful.

“Loving your wife is wrong?” She cocked her head to the side.

“No.”

“Try it John. You have had every part of me. Take this last part, if you don’t like it I will never ask again.”

“Why did you give me the oil?”

“It will make it more….. comfortable. A tiny bit is all that is needed. Just massage it into me.”

The smatter of fear and apprehension in blue didn’t go unnoticed.

“There is no shame in loving your wife in any way feasible. I will enjoy it as well as you.”

John grunted his acknowledgement.                             

Taking his hands and placing them at slim hips, she bent over his desk with legs spread. Back arched, exposing firm buttocks and more. John groaned softly. She wanted this, she wanted him. The desire was plain to see. Such a temptation it was to see her so very wet and ready.

Yes, he heard the tales from other men but it was something John never tried. The others sought out whores for such pleasures rather than their wives or even mistresses. No lady would ever allow for such to be done to her. Now here his wife was, begging for him to take her in the way that would frighten most any woman.

Granted, Alexandria was like no woman he had ever met in his life. She encouraged his passions and met them with her own. He could be rough as he wished and she loved him for it. He never had to temper his lusts. He had been so afraid of hurting or even harming her! Seeing his wife like this was something most men could only dream of. Here it was given freely.  

“By god. You are beautiful my Alexandria.” The words were barely a whisper.

Doing as directed with the oil. The tip of his finger slid in. He could feel the ring of muscle constrict and imagined how it would feel around him.

“Go slow John. Just enjoy yourself.”

His heart was beating fast. Fear and lust collided in his chest. Holding on, he pushed the head of his cock into her. Alexandria whimpered softly. He was hurting her!

“Just stay like that. It’s okay. Let me get used to you.”

Feeling her relax, John slid in deeper. Another whimper brought another pause. It was like a game of sorts. Finally, he was fully inside. Alex pushed back against him, wriggling her hips to grind against him. John took the hint and moved slowly at first.

“Harder, please my love. Please.” Alex pleaded with her husband for more.

More than happy to acquiesce to her demands, John thrust harder. It was like nothing he ever felt before. Strong hands, gripped tight on her hips. Gliding in and out over and over. God, she was so tight. It felt so good. So right. Already, he was fighting back the urge to release his pleasure deep into his beloved wife.

Every time he drove into Alex deeply, his testicles hit her sex. She was so wet, so very wet. The flood of wetness coated her thighs even. He could barely concentrate.  He slammed into Alexandria over and over. The little cries of pleasures made his already thick cock, harder and thicker. When she came, it was a flood. She gripped his cock tight. A ripple of muscle raced up him to his very core. With a roar of unexpected thunder, he lost himself within her. He had never had an orgasm that strong before. Hands dug into her hips, marking the flesh. For a moment, John felt that it would never stop and he didn’t wish for it to. Finally with one last spasm, he was exhausted. Laying across Alexandria’s back, John tried to catch his breath. Still buried to the hilt within her, he couldn’t think.

Pulling back, John looked to his wife in a daze. With a cloth, she cleaned them both up and tossed the cloth into the fire.

“John? Are you alright?”

“I didn’t hurt you did I?”

“Not in the least.”

Wrapping Alexandria up in his arms, he squeezed her tight. Laughing with the hug, she kissed him.

“I shall never doubt you again.”

He took his laughing wife to their bed and curled up with her.

“John?” Alex turned to look at him.

“Yes?”

“The love shared between a husband and a wife is never dirty, sinful, or wrong. Please do not think that way about us.”

“We have been married less than a year and you have shown me so many different things. I am not the same man I was prior to you my dearest wife.”

“Does that bother you?”

“Not in the least. I am truly blessed to have found you.”

“I am the one that is blessed John Thornton. You are a man far above others.”

John laughed softly and shook his head. “No my darling, I am not. You are biased but I am happy with your bias.”

 

 


	10. Chapter 10

On the night of Christmas Eve, Hannah Thornton read to her family and servants the story of Jesus being born in a manger. A crackle from the fireplace made each and every one in the large home grateful for something. Tomorrow morning the presents would be opened, the sweets tasted and all would settle down to a large Christmas dinner of roast beef.

Johnny Thornton was sitting between his parents listening aptly to his grandmother tell the tale of the very first Christmas. Alexandria had made up the stockings the rest of the family knew nothing about. She would sneak out and place them near the fireplace when she had a chance to do so. Warm and happy, Alex’s mind drifted to the day’s event.

Marlborough Mills had a wonderful Christmas Eve celebration for the workers and their families. Most of the workers brought something with them to go along with the turkey, potatoes, stuffing and sweets that Alexandria and John had provided.

Most of the workers knew Alexandria between the mill and the clinic. They all joined in teasing her and their Master. Higgins however simply watched the others. When the Mistress had a moment of refuge, he approached her quietly.

“Doctor, if I may have a word with ya?”

“Of course Mr. Higgins what can I do for you?”

“I wanted to thank ya.”

“Whatever for?”

“The Master and I go back a ways. When Miss Mar’get left Milton, he was a heartbroken man. When she came back ‘wit him he was so alive. They loved each other. It broke all our hearts when Miss Mar’get passed on. Don’t think I saw the Master smile or laugh for over four years. He’s happy again. I know he is a good man to ye. We all see it in both of your faces. Thank you for taking care of him.”

Tears pricked Alexandria’s eyes. “Thank you Mr. Higgins. I love him dearly. Thank you.”

Higgins brushed the thanks off and started to laugh. “Looks like the Master is lookin’ for ye ma’am.”

“Uh-oh. I may be in trouble.” Smiling happily, she waved to her husband.

Johnny and John Thornton, having found Alexandria, walked over to where she and Higgins were standing.

Johnny ran up to his mother and gave her a tight hug. Alexandria dropped a warm kiss on the top of his head.

“Mr. Higgins!” Johnny solemnly shook the man’s hand before running off to play with some of the Boucher children.

“Enjoying yourself Higgins?” John shook his friend’s hand.

“Aye Master. Yersself?”

“Best Christmas I have had in a long time.” John said softly, looking to his wife.

Alexandria was startled back from the reverie when Hannah closed the Bible. She saw that Johnny was dozing off. Smiling, Grandmother, Father, and Mother took him to bed. He was too sleepy for a story so each one of them kissed his smooth brow good night. Alexandria paused to place the stuffed bunny she had made for him on the bed. Within a few moments, he was already sound asleep.

Tomorrow would be a busy day, so the three adults said good night and retired to their own beds.

John and Alexandria were preparing for bed when she stood behind him with her hands on his chest. Soft lips just barely touched the curve of his ear when she whispered.

“I have a special present for you my handsome love.”

“I rather like the sound of that.”

Chuckling softly. “Join me on the bed when you are finished?”

“It would be my pleasure.”

Curled up on the bed, there was a small wrapped package next to her. When John climbed into bed he looked embarrassed.

“I thought I was getting you for my special present.”

“You get this one first and that one next.”

Inside was a small painting, it was maybe 8 inches square. In the picture was John, Hannah, Johnny, and Alexandria. Alexandria was holding something on her lap. John shook his head, not understanding.

“Who did you have do this? It’s a lovely picture.”

“I did it.”

“I didn’t know you could paint my love.”

“I’m not the greatest nor the worst but if you look at the painting again there is something for you to notice.”

John did finally notice and laughed. “Planning our future already?”

“Not that far into the future actually.”

“Alexandria, do you mean that….”

“You will be a father again come August.” She smiled softly

“How long have you known?”

“A week give or take.”

“And you waited to tell me?”

Alexandria nodded, looking at John with quite the cheeky smile “I thought it would be a lovely Christmas gift.”

John Thornton, the often dour and scowling Master of Marlborough Mills let out a loud WHOOOP! Pulling Alexandria over to his side of the bed and into his arms he kissed her soundly. His hands danced across her still flat belly.

Laughing softly still, Alex laid a hand to John’s cheek. “My sweet John, oh how I love you so.”

Suddenly, John looked out of sorts. “I will miss making love to you.”

“Sweetheart, that is a long ways off before that has to happen.”

“Alexandria you don’t understand.”

“You are absolutely correct, I don’t.”

“Margaret’s death was my fault.” He couldn’t look her in the eyes. “I couldn’t curb my lust filled urges. She didn’t wish to……..for fear of the baby. Instead, I killed her.”

“You mean you two had sex?”

“Yes. Right up until a month before she gave birth. Then, she was gone shortly after Johnny was born.”

“Sweetheart, as long as the mother isn’t gravely ill, it’s perfectly fine to make love up until the finals weeks. Her passing away after giving birth, is not your fault.”

John Thornton, in his shame, turned away from his wife. He sat on the edge of the bed. It looked like he was about to go to a different room at any minute. While John was stubborn, Alexandria was even more so. Her father often said that she could out stubborn a mule. Climbing out of bed and going around to the other side, she stood in front of him.

“Look at me John.” Her hands rested lightly on his shoulders.

For a few heartbeats he just could not do so. When John finally did his eyes were wet with tears.

“Let’s start from the beginning okay? I may ask some embarrassing questions. I don’t mean to embarrass you. I need some help filling in the blanks.” Alex climbed on the bed beside him, pressed close. “Did Margaret enjoy sex?”

“Not really. Other than our honeymoon, I often had to cajole her into it. Alexandria, I never forced her. Please know that.”

Kissing his lips tenderly, she smiled. “I know you better than that beloved. So how often did it happen?”

“No more than a couple of times a week. After she found out she was pregnant, it was once a month. She told me it is bad for the baby.”

Stroking the back of her knuckles against his cheek, she smiled gently. “If it was so bad for the baby, there would be a lot fewer births than there are now. Did she have any health problems? Was she sick a lot throughout the pregnancy?”

“None that I know of. Just at the very beginning.”

“John, you did nothing wrong. Sometimes things happen during the birthing process or afterwards.”

“I got her pregnant.”

“John……”

“She didn’t want relations. I shouldn’t have talked her into it.”

“Come here.” Alex slid further into the bed and laid down. Tugging gently on his hand, she pulled him close. His body was warm against her own. “Look at me John Thornton.  I swear to you as a doctor, your wife, and your friend. You did nothing wrong. Whatever happened, simply happened. Women give birth every single day. Some are difficult births, yes. Some are also easy. We don’t get to pick out which we receive. We cannot decide if we are going to have a boy or a girl. I swear to you on my own life John Thornton. You were not at fault.”

He studied her for a few moments. He hadn’t really considered her a friend. Brow furrowing slightly, he realized it was true. Not only his friend, but his closest friend. That made the ache more profound.

“I am afraid.”

“What are you afraid of?” Alex stroked her fingers through his black hair.

“That I will lose you too. I cannot lose you. I would give my life to save yours.”

“No need. You cannot get rid of me John.” She smiled.

“I would never wish to.” John ran his hand down the flat plane of his wife’s belly. “It’s hard to believe you are with child.”

“Give it a little time, I will be as big as your cotton mill!”

“I hardly think so.”

His touch was gentle. John moved his hands across and over most of Alexandria’s body. It was like he was trying to imprint every inch of her into his memory. The cold chill in his heart was still there. His fear of losing her was profound. 

Their lips met with a kiss of need. Pushing Alexandria back to the sheets, John covered her with his body. Lifting her hips, she wrapped long legs around his waist. Arms went around his neck, her body clinging to his. Sliding into her, John groaned softly.

“Look at me John. Look at me.”

Opening his eyes, he met her gaze.

“Do you feel it? Do you feel how much I want you? Feel how wet I am, for you alone.” Hips arched upwards while she ground against his pelvis. Hot wetness clenched his cock. “I love you. I love having you inside of me John. I love the feeling of your body on mine, under mine. I just want you as close as you can be to me. I will never stop wanting that my husband. I love all of you.”

He kept his eyes trained on hers. Reaching under, he grasped her rounded bottom, squeezing tight. Now holding her down, John began to thrust harder. She tightened around him, nearly pushing him out. It just made him thrust harder and deeper within.  When Alex tossed her head back and whimpered her pleasure of him, oh how John smiled.

It was almost too much, but there was no way she would ever complain at how he felt. To Alexandria this was the purest of all pleasures.

“Yessssssss. My love, oh my love, you feel wonderful.” With a tilt of her head, Alex captured John in another kiss. Biting, nipping at his lips, she was hungry for him.

Breaking the kiss, John suckled upon her taut nipples. Long nails scratched down his back. All it did was make him groan with the pleasure. Heels dug into his backside, urging him further. Pulling away, John Thornton looked to his wife. Her eyes were wild with lust, and he knew that he was all for him. Pulling her closer her bottom nearly resting at the tops of his thighs. Slick as he was with her wetness, John slowly slid into the tight star of her bottom. Alex lifted off the bed, shoulders pressed heavily into the sheets.

Grabbing her legs, he pulled her closer. It permitted him further entrance to a place he felt sinful just a short while ago. Softly, Alexandria cried out his name and the love she held for him. He slowly began to thrust harder into her while rough fingers teased against her pearl. It took no time at all before her body shook with the ultimate pleasure. He didn’t stop then, teasing her more and thrusting even harder, Alexandria hit a higher note, her body started to shake and hands curled into the sheets so hard that if she had been more aware, she would have fretted tearing them.

Finally, John found his own pleasures in his wife’s body. Buried fully within her, he came and came hard. It was if there was an animal in the room with them, the great growling calls of his own were like music to Alex’s ears.

Pulling out suddenly, he dropped heavily between Alex’s thighs. He wasn’t done yet. Still teasing her, his fingers moved fast while his tongue darted in and out. His reward was a rush of wetness when she came again and again. It was only when she whimpered and stilled did he stop. Spent fully, Alex laid back and just smiled.

Pulling himself up next to her, John took Alexandria into his arms and held tight to her. Their kiss was one of tenderness and mutual love. In no time, they were both asleep.

Alexandria woke a couple of hours later. She slipped away from the warm bedroom to place stockings on the fireplace mantle for John, Johnny, and Hannah. She had one for herself, but it wasn’t filled like the others were. She wasn’t sure if this was a tradition or not, but it was with her family. Quietly she went back to bed. Climbing back in, she woke John.

“Something wrong?” His voice tinged with sleep.

“Not at all.”

Grunting, John pulled her back to him. Comfortable, they both found sleep quite easily.

Christmas morning was the only morning that it was acceptable in the Thornton household to be seen in night clothes and a dressing gown. After presents were unwrapped and stockings unpacked, the family went to dress for the morning meal. Since it took Alex longer to get ready, when John was finished he went to help his son. They broke their fast happily. Hannah told stories of a boyhood John. Alex told stories of her life growing up with minimal editing on her behalf.

The rest of the morning was taken up with a trip to the church for Christmas mass. Johnny sat next to Alex, like he always did. She had an arm around his shoulders. Her other hand was held discreetly by John.

During the sermon, Alexandria mused on her life. She had never been as happy as she was right now. Grateful for the life she had currently, it worried her some. What happens if this all abruptly ends? The fear of losing this life was an icicle stabbing her heart. As much as she wanted to return to her life before, she didn’t want to leave this one now.

The heavy wet snow began again shortly after Church, so the Thornton family went back home to the warmth of the sitting room. Alexandria had gotten Johnny a game set. He would be able to learn checkers, chess, dominoes and backgammon on it. John had thought it was a little too old for Johnny, but Alex insisted.  

Sitting on the floor with Johnny, she used John’s legs as a backrest. She knew that Hannah didn’t exactly approve of Alex being on the floor as such, but Alex viewed it as important to be on the same level as Johnny. Every so often John would reach down and stroke the back of Alex’s neck. He was reading a new book that was a gift and Hannah was sorting through the new sewing basket happily.

“Mother, son? We have some news for you.” John said with a smile.

Johnny looked to Alex and then to his father. Hannah stopped what she was doing and looked to her son.

“Alexandria is pregnant.” John looked down to her with a happy smile. “We will have a new member of the household come August.”

“That is lovely news John.” Hannah smiled. If she said something to Alexandria, it went unheard.

Johnny looked as if the world was ending. He looked away so he wouldn’t start to cry. Of course Alexandria noticed it immediately.

“Johnny, my son, what is wrong?” Alex sat next to him.

“I don’t want you to go away Mama!”

Bewildered, she questioned him. “I’m not going anywhere. Where do you think I would go?”

“To heaven! That’s what happens when someone is born, they take the mama.”

“No my son, that is not true.”

“It is!”

“I promise you it isn’t. Have I ever lied to you before?” She started to rub his back.

“No Mama.”

“Then trust me. I will be right here with Grandmother, Father, you, and your new brother or sister.”

“Are you going to love my new brother or sister more than me since they came from your belly?”

“No Johnny. You are always going to be our first born. You will always be my first born son.”

Standing up, Johnny wrapped his arms around Alex’s shoulders. He hugged his stepmother tight. “I love you Mama.”

“I love you too my Sweet Johnny Boy.” She hugged him tight as well.

John and Hannah watched Alexandria with Johnny. It was easy to see that she loved the boy and he loved her back. John smiled softly and looked to his mother. Unspoken words were shared between them. Often times, when a man remarries the new wife replaces the man’s children from his first wife with her own. That would never happen with Alexandria. Heart and soul, Johnny was her boy. She would dare anyone to say otherwise.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	11. Chapter 11

Winter turned to spring and finally spring was warm. The month of May was beautiful. The spring flowers were at their peak. Fragrant and alive, the smoky town of Milton was bursting with color. Alexandria was due in a little over three months. She had to slow things at the clinic some because of it. Still, she was healthy and energetic as ever. She and John celebrated their first anniversary in this time and Johnny Thornton turned five. Their idyllic home life suited the couple well.

It was a slow day at the clinic. Alexandria decided to leave for lunch, as Annabelle was there to tend to anything small. Anything more, Alex was nearby. She was surprised to find Hannah dining alone.

“Where’s John Mother?”

“I suppose at the mill. He has been rather busy these last few days.”

Alexandria nodded. “I will bring him something and leave it. That way he could eat at his leisure.”

Hannah Thornton nodded and smiled. She was proud that her daughter-in-law was aware of John’s schedule. The women chatted while Alexandria ate. The cook packed a small basket so John could dine as well.

Walking to the mill, most of the hands acknowledged the Master’s wife. They were, as always, happy to see her. Even more so now, the Master was in a foul mood. She would even him out. Walking up to the office, she checked with the clerk to see if it was okay to go in to the office.

“At yer own risk Mrs. Thornton. Master is in a foul mood today.”

“Hopefully a bite of food will change that.” Alex smiled.

She rapped on the door. Frowning when John answered with a terse “what!!”

“What is wrong John?” She asked after opening and closing the door behind her.

Startled, John looked up at the sound of her voice. It was rare that she came to the mill without being invited. “What are you doing here?”

Placing the small basket down on his desk, she walked behind him. Her hands touching shoulders and neck, she began to massage the tense muscles. “I thought you might need something to help your surly ways Mr. Thornton.”

“Am I being that awful?”

“From what I have heard, yes.”

He grunted as a response.

“What’s wrong John?”

“I am trying to write up a system to make things easier for ordering and maintaining stock and records while I am at home with you after our child is born.”

“John.” Alex laughed softly. “You can come back to the mill to do these things yourself if you wish. I do not need around the clock care. I am having a baby, not heart surgery.”

“They can do surgery on someone’s heart?”

“Uh. Not with any good results.” Almost screwed the pooch there, Alex thought.

“It doesn’t matter. I am staying home with you.” He left no room for argument.

“Perhaps, I can help you?”

“Do you know anything about ordering cotton?” He teased. The tension in his voice was gone.

“No, but I do know how to write up systems.”

Rising from his chair, he made Alexandria sit down. Explaining to her what he was needing to do, she started taking notes. Pausing every so often to concentrate, she made it into a simple flow chart. He would have to plug in the math, because she didn’t know what he was using. Within a half an hour, they had everything figured out.

“I best be going back to my own work.” She rose from the chair. Kissing John’s lips softly, she smiled at her husband.

“I may hold you hostage. You make my work much more entertaining.” He pulled her close to him.

“Ahhh but if it is you holding me hostage, who would bother to pay the ransom?”

“It makes it a win-win situation for me. I get to keep you and not spend a cent.”

“Are all Mill Masters so adorable?” Alex laughed.

“You have met the ones here. I am sure you can answer that yourself.”

“And in my estimation you are completely one of a kind my Husband.” Kissing his lips one more time, she headed back out.

The windows were opened that evening to let in the summer breeze. Alexandria, John, and Hannah were seated and discussing the masters’ dinner. Alexandria and Hannah were of the mind to go ahead and have the dinner early.  John disagreed. He thought it was pushing too close to Alexandria being due.

“John, if we have the dinner on the date your mother picked I won’t be due for over two months.”

“Your wife in correct John. There is nothing improper about it.”

“I do not care if it is proper or not. Alexandria is going to be needing to rest, not hosting a blasted dinner!”

Catching his hand, Alex gave it a squeeze. “My dear husband, I know you are concerned. I am in perfect health and as strong as you.” She laughed softly when his brow rose upwards with her declaration of strength. “You of all people know I will go positively mental if you don’t allow me to do things. It’s not as if I am doing the work all myself. Your mother and the servants are here. As a matter of fact, I suspect your mother will be in charge seeing how I have never hosted the masters dinner before.”

John scowled at his wife and mother. Both were nonplussed by the look he gave them, as usual.

“Very well. If you both would excuse me.” John stood up abruptly and walked away.

Alexandria watched him leave and didn’t get up to follow. John Thornton had a temper, this she knew. She did not pander to that temper either. He would settle down shortly, as he always did. Rubbing a tired hand across her face, she looked to Hannah with a sigh.

“As your due date gets closer, he is going to get worse Alexandria.”

“You read my mind Mother Thornton.”

“He is frightened. He has made himself believe he is going to lose you.”

“I know. I wish I could convince him that I will be fine.”

“He won’t believe it until you are.”

“I’m going to go check on him, if you would excuse me please.”

“Of course.’

Checking throughout the home, Alex was unable to find her husband. Frowning, that meant the mill or simply outside. The night was comfortable, so the day to day shawl was left hanging. It took silvery grey eyes just a heartbeat to adjust. Stealth was a gift Alexandria was born with and without a lantern to guide her, she approached John without being seen.

“Excuse me, Sir? Is this seat taken?”

John visibly jumped at the sound of her voice. He scowled at her. “You are alone?”

“Of course.”

“You shouldn’t be out here without an escort Alexandria.”

“I expected you to be my escort.”

“You have no idea what could have happened to you if someone found you out here alone.”

“I have a better idea than most.”

“Let me take you back to the house.”

“No.”

“No?”

“We need to talk John.”

“I am not in the mood to talk.”

“Then listen.”

“I feel as if you have been comparing me to your late wife. Alas, we share very little in common. In the comparison, I do not fare well. I am perfectly fine with that. I want to be no one else but me. But it still is hurtful. I thought you cared about me, loved me even. I was nothing but a subpar replacement.”

“Alexandria.”

“John, please stop and allow me to finish this.”

There was a certain sadness in her voice. “John Thornton, I am not Margaret. I never have been and never will be. She may have been the love of your life, but that doesn’t make me her. ” Alex sighed. “If you wish for me to be Margaret, then you have a huge disappointment coming.”

As much as it pained her to say so, Alex spoke from the heart. “If you want me to leave Milton, so be it. I will return to the States. Please, never compare me to your lost wife. You seem to see her as frail. Do not project that upon me. Frail is one of the last things that I am.”

Pinching the bridge of her nose, she spoke again. “I am saddened to realize that I have somehow disappointed you. Realize this, I am my own person. I cannot be controlled unless I wish to be controlled. I will not pander to the rules of society in that I am somehow less because of my sex.

I am truly sorrowful that you lost Margaret, John. Not just for you but for Johnny too. I cannot fathom what the loss of a spouse must be like.” Biting her lip, she continued. “I am sorry that I do not meet what you desire. Since, I do not. I will leave you with your thoughts.” Many times he tried to interrupt her, she didn’t allow it. Now, it didn’t matter.

Rising from her place beside him, Alexandria walked back to the Thornton home in silence. Sighing with relief, Hannah was nowhere to be seen. Making a pallet on the floor of what had been the old nursery, she tried to sleep.

Alexandria left before the first light of day to go to the clinic. She prayed for a quiet day. Exhaustion from the lack of sleep and being so far along in her pregnancy did not make it any easier. The whistle blew at the end of the work day, she didn’t bother to walk back up to the large house. Instead, Alex took advantage of the quiet of the clinic and decided a nap was in order. For a week this went on.

It had been quite a long time since she wished to return home, now she did once again. The pain was constant and one that Alexandria had never felt before. Never before had she felt the sort of love she had for John Thornton. It was more than just him, Johnny was in all ways except biological her son. Hannah Thornton had a reputation for being strict and fierce, but fair. Alexandria loved her too.

Yet, she performed her duties as if nothing was wrong. There was plenty of food and clothing in the clinic, so that wasn’t an issue. If anyone realized she wasn’t walking the 100 feet, outside of John and Hannah, to the Thornton home, nobody said a word.

Alexandria had already made the choice to leave. Milton was just too painful. She would be on the first evening train to London. She only carried one bag. The other stuff wasn’t important. She would leave the wedding ring behind. It was an heirloom that had been passed down on Hannah’s side of the family. She hoped that it would be given to Johnny and that it would be loved as Alex once did.

Four letters were placed on her desk. One for John, one each for Hannah and Johnny, the final for the new physician that would come eventually.

Accompanied with a shattered heart, Alexandria Copeland Thornton was on the train for London.

 

  


	12. Chapter 12

It was Hannah Thornton that went to check on Alexandria the next morning. There she found the empty clinic and the four letters. Not wanting to wait, she read her own and Johnny’s. Mrs. Hannah Thornton was a proud woman. Also, she was not an emotional sort of woman. This even made her ache for what her daughter-in-law must be feeling. The ring that had been passed down through the generations was there, left so that Johnny may have it someday.  That spoke deeply to Hannah.

Her son was already at the mill, deciding to take the letter to him rather than wait, she tucked the ring, her own letter and Johnny’s into pockets. She was a familiar face in the mill and the grim set of her lips were also familiar. The workers didn’t greet her with the familiarity like they did Alexandria, Hannah was fine with it.

The Master of Marlborough Mills was looking out across the workers with a scowl on his face and arms folded. His brow furrowed upon seeing his mother. This was too early for her rounds, but still nothing unusual. Hannah Thornton went to his office without a word. He, of course, followed.

“What is wrong Mother?”

“Your wife is gone John.” She slapped the still sealed envelope against his chest.

Frowning deeper, he read the letter. Bristling with anger, he tossed the letter into a nearby bin. “Stubborn obstinate woman!”

“Stubborn obstinate man!”

John looked at his mother with surprise. She had never spoken a word against him in all his years.

Hannah took her son’s hand and dropped the ring on to his palm. “You still mooned over Margaret didn’t you? Wanting what was in death rather than what you had in life. Your LIVING wife loved you. Even I could see you were still mourning Margaret while you were married to Alexandria. You can be callous John, but I didn’t realize how deep it went.”

Fury burned in John’s eyes. “Is that what she told you?”

“Not at all John. Would you like me to read you the letter?”

_Dearest Mother Thornton,_

_First of all, I wish to thank you for being so kind to me during my stay in Milton. I am as proud to call you Mother as I am to call you a friend. I am not sure of how to say this or if it will even make sense. I must return to the States. Something has come up and I cannot explain it. I dare not even try. Please know that I love You, John, and Johnny with all of my heart and soul._

_This is no one’s fault but my own. I shall have the marriage annulled and the paperwork sent on to Milton. That way, if John ever wishes, he may remarry. I beg of you, please do not hate me for leaving like this. My heart is heavy as it is. Please get Johnny a nanny that will teach him, love him, and play with him. He will be a great man when he reaches adulthood. I have left money that will pay for the nanny until he is ready for school.  I have also left a bank account that will pay for his schooling, college, and monies for both you and John in case of an emergency._

_All of my love,_

_Alexandria Copeland Thornton._

“John, there is 75,000 pounds in that account. She left the banking paperwork for me to have. As much as I blamed Margaret Hale for hurting you, I blame you for hurting Alexandria.”  As Alex had pleaded with her not to give John the information, Hannah Thornton knew where she was staying for a few days in London and kept silent about it. “What did she say to you, son?”

He retrieved the letter from the bin and handed it to his mother.

_My John,_

_You are the love of my life. My one and only true love. I am so sorry that I didn’t have the strength or fortitude to stay in Milton. I told you once that your choice of my staying wasn’t up to you. I would stay if I wished. I had not known how prophetic those words would become. Now, I cannot stay. I failed you John Thornton. I can only ask for your forgiveness now. Perhaps one day you will be able to understand and grant me that._

_I wish I could explain so this would make more sense, but I need to return to my old life and sort things out. Understand, this fault falls entirely on my lap. I was once a foolish girl and now I am a foolish women. I should not ask for a favor. You have no reason to grant me such. Yet, I beg of you, please tell my son, my Johnny that Mama will never stop loving him._

_I left financial information with your mother. It should be enough to get Johnny a nanny, send him to school, and pay his college tuition. There should be plenty to put up in case of a rainy day for you and your mother as well.  I wish I could have been better for you. That is my own failure, not yours._

_I love you,_

_Alexandria_

“Mother, would you leave me please?”

Hannah Thornton said nothing, turned and walked out of his office.

Telling the clerk that unless the mill was on fire, he did not want to be interrupted. John sat behind the desk with his head in his hands. Things had been off between him and his wife for a while. In his heart, John knew that it was because of him. It was time to peel back the layers of himself and find out where he went wrong.

He couldn’t blame Alexandria for leaving. Hell, they were 100 feet from each other most of the time and he couldn’t even walk over to check on her. In fact, he purposely ignored her when she tried to talk to him. The longer they were apart, the angrier he became that she wasn’t Margaret. Margaret would never had done that to him, John thought before. It was all a lie that he convinced himself to believe.  No, Alexandria was not Margaret that much was true. Yet, Margaret was no Alexandria either.

Margaret was a perfect wife. Yet, Alexandria was the perfect woman. She was passionate, beautiful, fierce, and had an intelligence like John had never seen before. She loved like he had never seen before. This wasn’t a love from Fanny’s old silly novels. Nor was this a love of convenience because they were matched together. No, this was a love that was every inch of her heart, soul, and body.

He took that for granted.  He had taken her for granted.

Was it because Margaret was no longer here that he wished for what he could not have? Perhaps it was too soon to marry? Did he love Alexandria? Maybe it was lust? Was it because how she was with Johnny? John had no idea.

The last whistle blew and John Thornton was no closer to an answer than he was that morning. The mill slowly shut down as it always did. There he stayed. He didn’t bother to light a candle and he had no desire for food or drink.

What did matter now was the realization of how cold he was to his wife. That was not what a man does. She spoke from the heart and he gave her his back. Somewhere in the back of his mind it clicked that he would never see their child and while the thought hurt, he felt that he deserved the pain it caused.

Perhaps it was better that she was gone and would have their marriage annulled.

Sighing, he stood from his chair and ran a hand over his face. It was too dark to see his pocket watch to know the time.  Walking back to his home, John realized how dark it was. There were no candles burning in the windows of his home. The mill almost looked abandoned. The clinic seemed to disappear into the shadows as if it had followed its mistress. The air was still and with the clouds no stars or moon could shine through. The world he always knew now seemed to have dropped into a void. In the warm night air, John Thornton felt a chill.

The back door was not barred and he barred it as he often did when coming home from working late. He had climbed these stairs so many times, he needed not a candle to find his way. His mother was not there to greet him. He could count on one hand the number of times she didn’t meet him in the sitting room and that was usually because of Fanny being still a child.

Checking on his son, John found the boy sleeping. He had the bunny that Alexandria had made for him tight in his arms. John sighed. Johnny would miss her greatly. Margaret never was the boy’s mother. She merely gave birth to John Thornton II. Alexandria was the first mother he knew. She loved his boy as if he were her own. Johnny returned that love to her. Johnny ran to Alexandria first for everything. She was the first person he greeted in the early morning and the last person he said goodnight to in the evenings. John realized something. She was as devoted to his family completely. Alexandria loved them all deeply and with complete devotion. Hannah and Johnny returned that love and devotion to her but John did not.

It made John take pause. So many of the others in the same social class as the Thorntons, permitted maids, servants, even a nanny or two to raise their children. Children were to be seen and not heard, others felt. His son never knew that sort of loneliness with Alexandria. Even before John asked to court her, she was always happy to see the boy in the shops or on the streets. She had confessed once to John that she kept a small supply of sweets on her for Johnny.

The bed chambers were once again just his. Yet, the ghosts of Alexandria were everywhere. Her hairbrush was sitting on the vanity. John caught the subtle scent of her hand cream. A book, half read, resided on the table on Alex’s side of the bed. John sighed.

Looking down at his bedclothes, John frowned. Most of the time he slept naked with his wife. Oh how he loved her ardor and passion. There was no shame between them. He could touch her smooth fair skin for hours and she would beg him for more. She would initiate their love making often. When he did, she gave herself to him happily. There had always been such pleasure in waking limbs tangled with her own. There were so many times that she had returned late from the clinic to find him asleep. She would press close to him in the night, making sure he knew she was home with him. Oh the many mornings that John woke to find himself filled with lust. She would awaken just to satisfy him. The smile upon her lips told him that he returned the favor in kind.

Thinking of the last night they spent together. In the middle of the night, he had woken up from a strange dream. Alexandria was sleeping soundly. Her back was to his chest. John had moved her gently, pulling her leg back over his thigh. Gently, he parted her sex with gentle strokes of fingertips. She still had not fully left slumber’s grasp. John slid into his wife with ease. Hot and wet, his thrusts started gently and slowly built. The rough pad of his thumb rubbed her pearl in time with his thrusts. Awake, she began to thrust back to him. Thinking about how good she felt, was starting to arouse him even now. It took mere minutes until she found pleasure with him and only minutes more until he found his own. They fell back asleep together, in the same position, still inside of his wife.

He had paid for women a few times as a young man to sate his carnal urges. The women were nothing but vessels. They felt nothing for him. He felt nothing for them either. Those ventures were never satisfying. He thought it would be different with Margaret. She performed her wifely duties, but rarely actually participated in their love making. John heard many times over from other men that it common for their wives to behave as such. Which was why so many of John’s peers kept a mistress as well. Women were taught virtue yet to obey their husbands. It wasn’t something they found thrilling it seemed. Women were taught that sex was painful, sinful, and dirty. They permitted but did not participate. To so many of the women, it seemed, sex was merely procreation and something they had to endure.

Alexandria was different. She took great joy in their lovemaking. Her pleasures came from and with his own. She was not shy in it either. She loved to tease him. She loved to tempt him and keep that temptation going for hours. How many times had he taken her in his office? The need for her was great. It was not unusual for him to seek her company during business hours several times and then enjoy a longer time together into the night. In a cloud of doubt, he often wondered why she enjoyed what most women did not.

And to God above it was so true, f he wished for something rough, she didn’t just give in. Instead, she relished the way his body connected to hers. John realized something. He never thought he made love to her, instead they made love together.

Their marriage had been delightfully happy in the beginning. What had changed? Was it him or was it her? The realization struck John so fiercely that he gasped in pain. One of the reasons he pushed Alexandria away because it was easier to be without now than feel the loss later.    

It happened slowly at first., thought John.  It wasn’t until she began to really show that he started to compare her so harshly to Margaret. Margaret was long buried. She would never be amongst the living again. In that aspect, Margaret was safe to hold the love filled memories within him. Whereas, Alexandria was living. She too could go to the grave as Margaret did. It was safer for him to have the distance. There was more to it than that, but what? Slowly, he began to pull back the layers to what had happened.

Sitting on the edge of what was once their bed, John tried to distance himself from the memories so that he may look at them more objectively. He had read both letters. Not once did she say anything against him. Alexandria took the blame for his failings. That hurt his ego far more than John Thornton was willing to admit.

Her gentleness and generosity once held John in awe. Actually, it still did.  She never cared if someone could pay for medical services. From rich to poor, they were all treated with the same warmth and care. The rich rarely came for help. They thought her clinic was beneath them. That is until an emergency came about, then they had no choice.

Thinking back to when they hosted a merchant’s dinner and how he treated the woman that would become his wife. John would readily admit an attraction to Alexandria even back then. She was stunningly beautiful after all. Something pricked a memory in him. It made John realize how he was loathe to admit how he treated her.

He had gotten it his head that she was far beneath his station. He had no desire to introduce “the lady doctor” to others. As he and his mother were the only two people that knew her, the duty fell to him as a requirement. He was deeply embarrassed by Alexandria. The mill masters and a few other men talked about her. These men decided she was one to bed but not to wed. All of the men, except John, spoke of how they wanted to bed her. Some of them went into great detail even.

Then Dr. Alexandria Copeland saved his son’s life.

Alas, the other men were right. _She was one to bed but not to wed._

His resentment for his wife started long before they were married and he just now realized it.

The Lady Doctor was what most everyone called Alex when she first arrived in Milton. The mill workers usually called her Doctor Alex once they were used to the idea of a female physician. The shop owners referred to her as Dr. Copeland. That was because they liked her money, rather than out of respect. The upper classes didn’t refer to her at all, unless it was for gossip.

John thought back to the first few meetings with her. Alexandria looked nothing the likes of Milton had ever seen. Frowning, he realized how many times he masturbated to the image of her in his mind and wished it was more than an image. Yet, Alexandria’s was biggest downfall were things she could do absolutely nothing about. She was too much.

Who would have ever believed that would be the problem. John barked a short laugh just thinking about it. Alex was too tall, too beautiful, too intelligent, and too kind. The list went on and on. That was the downfall of marrying her. The men lusted for a glimpse of her and the women wanted to gossip about her. Instead of taking the stance that he normally did of let them speak it made no never mind. Now after the one collapse of his business, he worried.

Laying back on his bed with feet still on the floor, his thoughts drifted. He impulsively asked to court her not once but twice. The first time he bedded her, John had no idea that what was already pleasurable could feel that incredible. He had never had a woman place her mouth upon him in such a way. It was dirty, wrong, but the most delicious of sensations.

The second time was even better when he was awakened by her in such a fashion. Not that he had that much experience with women, but her body was also unlike any others he had seen. Artwork, actual women, and books, none of it prepared him for her. While having the gentle curves of womanhood, she was also muscular. Alex looked far from masculine, on the contrary it somehow made her look more feminine. The exception was perhaps her height.

Immediately, he was infatuated with her.

The next impulsive move he made was to invite Alexandria to church. It was there that everything started. The carriage ride to church was wonderful. His mother actually enjoyed the company of the doctor. Hannah Thornton never fully approved of another woman as long as John could remember. This one, this embarrassing one, she liked. Johnny loved Alexandria. When she took the little boy’s hand exiting the carriage instead of John’s, Johnny was beside himself.

The looks that he saw from other members of his community were embarrassing. He wasn’t sure if it was because they thought he could do no better. Perhaps it had to do with Alexandria herself. Who knew, he certainly didn’t. Still, he was infatuated and mortified.

The walk and time with Johnny were special but the time in church felt tainted. John, so concerned about his place in life, began to worry more about what others thought than what he thought. The most painful part of all, this was also the time that he realized he loved her.

Clashing sides of him were able to keep the demons at bay. He was a dutiful husband. John tried hard to make her happy and be happy himself. So much of it was real but there was a façade as well. If only she would have behaved as a wife should have! Instead of being home she had to have the blasted clinic! It wasn’t like when Margaret would help the poor. Alexandria had a lofty position within Milton. Then another kernel of knowledge dropped on his lap.

John Thornton, Master of Marlborough Mills, was jealous.

If Alexandria had been a man, the position of a physician would have actually put her at a higher social level within the same circle. It was more than that too. Alexandria, was always lady outside of the bedroom. She dressed modestly, spoke intelligently, and was both proper and polite. There was no one that could find fault in her manners, not even John himself. Yet, he found fault with her simply because of the reaction of others. In the moment of realization, John Thornton hated himself.

He had never cared about how others thought of him. Possibly because the other masters had admired him. When he almost lost the mill, his word had become less than it once was but he built it back up to a prestigious level. It had diminished once again he THOUGHT because of Alexandria.

That was never true.

He had never lost the respect of the others. Rather, he lost respect for himself.  Somewhere in all of this he also began to hate himself because of it. Of course men looked at Alexandria, she was an attractive woman. The women that gossiped about her, gossiped about every woman they knew in Milton. It was one of the reasons his mother did not socialize with them often.

Alexandria was too much of everything because John felt that he wasn’t enough. Almost laughing at the realization, he knew it to be true. John Thornton lashed out at the woman he loved because he felt that he was unworthy of her. The worst part was that he had no way to ask her to forgive him.

 

 

 

 

 

 


	13. Chapter 13

Hannah Thornton had taken her grandson to Alexandria’s clinic several times while her daughter-in-law was staying there. When Johnny had asked to go see his Mama, Hannah was having a difficult time trying to tell him that she was gone. Hannah was unable to find the words and settled on telling the young lad they would go at a different time.

When John didn’t come down to breakfast, she assumed that he had already gone to the mill. It wasn’t unusual for him to do so. It was midmorning when John’s foreman came looking for John. Hannah sent the man on his way and went to find her son.

Still laying on the bed, feet on the floor, was John. He had not slept.

“John! Are you ill?” Asked Hannah.

“No.”

“Why are you not at the mill?”

“I am a failure mother.

“What do you mean?”

“I failed my wife. I hurt her the way I have never hurt another person in all my years. I was cruel, thoughtless, and hateful.”

“Yes, you were.”

John rolled his head to the side to look at his mother. “I didn’t deserve her. She didn’t deserve my treatment of her.”

“It’s over now John. You need to pull yourself together. You have a business and a son that both need you.”

“I am taking the day off.”

“John Thornton, you will do no such thing. It was by your hand that did the damage. You do not get a day to feel sorry for yourself and lick your wounds. You need to talk to your son and tell him what has happened and then you need to talk to the hands that will be looking for your wife.”

“You are correct.” John sighed and sat up.

Hannah didn’t say anything else to her son and walked away. She had errands to run, including a stop at the bank and the post office.

When his mother left, John laid back on the bed. Truly, he meant to get up but was just unable to do so yet. His thoughts settled back on Alexandria. He had wronged her horribly. The realization that she was well and truly gone was painful. Yet, John understood that it was his fault. He could speak with her about anything, except his own feelings. Even the small things that happened at the mill, it might take a bit of understanding but she was able to catch on quickly. He had said to Higgins more than once that given a bit of training, Alexandria could probably run the mill better than he could.

Once again, Hannah Thornton thought that her son had returned to work. Having always listened to her in the past, there was no reason to think differently. Nightfall came and when he had not returned home after the mill long since finished for the day, she went to check on him. The mill was completely devoid of life and that included John. Exasperated, she returned home and without bothering to knock Hannah entered John’s bedroom. He was finally sleeping.

Hannah didn’t bother him, as much as she wished to. Instead she went to check on her grandson and get him ready for his supper. They had just sat down to eat when there was someone at the door. One of the maids went down to answer it. Frowning, Hannah wasn’t exactly positive who it could be coming at the late hour, but she did have an idea.

The visitor was no visitor at all, it was Alexandria. Bending to kiss her mother-in-law’s cheek, she spoke softly. “Telegram received Mother Thornton.”

Johnny’s face went from sullen to happy at the appearance of his stepmother. He raced over to her, burying his face in Alexandria’s skirts. “I missed you Mama.”

“I missed you too my boy.” Bending down Alexandria hugged her son tight. Tears formed in her eyes but did not fall. She had shed enough tears over John Thornton these last days and refused to let another drop.

“You look tired my dear. Would you like to join us for dinner?” Hannah had not been certain that she would respond to the telegram.

“I am rather tired, but no thank you Mother. I would like to speak with John, if he is about?”

“He is in your bedchambers.” Hannah noticed that Alexandria flinched at the word ‘your’.

“Thank you.” Kissing the top of Johnny’s head she spoke to him. “You and I will talk in a bit. Finish your dinner first.”

“Yes ma’am.”

“Thank you Johnny.”

Nodding to Hannah, Alexandria went to the once shared bed chamber in search of John. Steeling herself, there was a decision about knocking and she decided not to. Pushing the door open, it was completely dark. Frowning, it was far too early for him to be in bed. Closing the door, she let her eyes adjust to the darkness. John was laying on his bed, sleeping.

Shaking her head, she walked over and sat upon the edge of the bed. With a gentle touch, she pushed back the hair from his face. His sleep must have been restless for his hair was damp.

“Am I dreaming?” He asked hoarsely.

“No.

“You came back to me.”

“Also, no. I leave tomorrow. Your mother was able to reach me and I came.  I will take the last train back to London tonight.”

“I see.” John frowned. “Are we still married?”

“Until you sign the paperwork, yes.”

“I will not sign it Alexandria.”

“That is your choice John. I released you from our marriage. Whether or not you decide to stay married is your choice.” She started to rise.

John took her hand gently. “Please, do not go. I wish to speak with you.”

Afraid this was what was going to happen, Alexandria sighed. “Permit me to light a candle or two then.”

John lit one next to the bed and she lit a few others around the room. He was sitting up and she did not approach. She took a seat in the chair at his desk. She was stunned by his appearance. John was always neatly attired. His eyes were bloodshot and had dark circles around them. His hair was a mess and instead of being shaven, he was grizzled.

As he looked at Alexandria, John noticed that even from the long train ride that she was well dressed and attired as a woman of her station should be. It had been 10 day since he saw her last. Alexandria had lost weight, it was easy to see. Yet, the weight loss and the wariness in her eyes were the only outward appearances that something was wrong.

“I am sorry.” John spoke softly. “I am sorry for the hurt I caused you. I behaved horridly towards you. I am so sorry for what I did to you, to us.”

“Thank you John.” She tipped her head forward. “I best be going now. I want to see Johnny before I leave again.”

“Alex, please.”

Standing, a single eyebrow shot upwards. He had never called her Alex before. “Please what John?”

“Please don’t go.”

“I cannot stay. This is not the place for me.”

“I love you Alexandria Thornton.”

“I believed that at one time. I no longer do.” She turned towards the door.

John moved from the bed and towards her. His hand touched the door to the room gently. He would not force the issue, but he did not wish to see her go. “I won’t stop you. All I ask is for you to listen for a few minutes more.”

“Do you think you deserve my attention John Thornton?” When he said nothing, she continued. “This was all a lie. I owe you nothing. I paid my debt for leaving you. I was generous enough to return at your mother’s pleas. While I owe Johnny an explanation, I owe you absolutely nothing John Thornton. You are the one that broke my heart, not the other way around.”

“I know. I beg you please Alex. You are still my wife, continue to be so for a few more minutes and then I will sign the paperwork.”

“Very well.” She sighed.

“The first time I saw you, I spoke to you in a gruff manner. Even that first meeting, I was attracted to you. How could I not be? You are beautiful. I didn’t want to be. I was still mourning Margaret. I felt that I was being unfaithful to her. It was far worse the second time I saw you. You had settled in. I thought I was being magnanimous by ‘allowing’ you to stay. You put me in my place immediately.” John’s eyes closed briefly, remembering.

“It was my mother’s idea to invite you to the merchant’s dinner. I did not want you there. If it had been up to me, you would not have been invited. I am glad you were. You saved my son’s life.” He ran a hand through his unkempt hair. “Spending time with you in the clinic, I wanted more. I fell in love with you swiftly. The first time we made love, you taught me that a woman could enjoy relations. I had no idea. It always seemed to be something women endured but didn’t enjoy.

God, how I loved you. Yet, I am a foolish man. I saw the lust in the eyes of other men. The women gossiped about you. I was both jealous and embarrassed. Then I became angry. If you didn’t have the clinic and stayed home like a proper wife, I thought I wouldn’t have the feelings that I was. I didn’t understand until much later that the feelings were mine and mine alone. The men looked at you because you are a beautiful woman. The women gossiped, just as they did about every other woman they know. In my own fears, I treated you terribly. My sweet Alexandria. I betrayed you. When I should have held your hand, I gave you my back. There is nothing I regret more than hurting you. Your kind sweet nature made it so easy for me to do so. I didn’t hurt just you. I hurt my entire family. They love you. I love you. And I chased you away.” He hung his head and stopped for a breath.

“I took your love for granted. I took you for granted.” He looked her in the eye. “There are no words that could explain how sorry I am to have done that to you. I did not act as a man acts. I didn’t even have the decency to act as a boy, no I was a simple ignorant fool. I pushed you away out of fear. I was terrified I would have to bury you. It seemed safer at the time to keep a distance than to love our time together.

At the Master’s dinner one of the men stated that you were one to bed but not to wed.” He swallowed hard, his chest hurting at the memory. “It rang true at first.” John saw the fury in Alex’s silvery eyes. “Please, let me explain further. You were so different than anyone I had ever known. You were too pretty, too intelligent, too kind, too everything. So it made me believe that ugly statement. It was actually that I felt unworthy of you. I was a mere merchant. I am a big, rough, uncouth fellow. You surpassed everything I could imagine having in my life. You not only are a doctor but a female one. You had everything stacked against you my darling girl and still you persevered. How many men can say that let alone women? I spent a lot of time thinking that the other masters had lost respect for me because of you. It was actually was I lost respect for myself because of how I treated you. I thought it was you I hated but it was myself. You I loved completely.”

Drawing a deep breath, Alex nodded. “Thank you John.” She started to leave.

“Alexandria, don’t go. You are still my wife. You carry **_our_** child. I love you. Perhaps one day you will forgive what I have done. If not, so be it. I will understand. Stay for my mother and my son then. You have a home. You have the clinic. I will not ask you to share my bed. You will have your own set of rooms.”

“John? Why would I wish to stay and be reminded daily that my husband hated me?”

“Because you know that I also loved you.”

“It’s not that simple.”

“It can be.” With a careful approach, John kissed Alexandria softly. She did not react but she didn’t push him away either. “Stay my love. I beg you to stay with me. We can take things slow. I will court you properly this time. I have prayed every moment of every day that you and I will be together forever. Our souls entwined with each other throughout the ages.” He touched her cheek with reverence. “Permit me to be the husband you deserve. Let me show you what love truly is.”

Pinching the bridge of her nose, Alex sighed softly. “I will be back shortly.”

“Where are you going?”

“I wish to tuck Johnny in. I swore I would see him tonight.”

John nodded. “Please return so that we may speak more.”

“I shall.”

Exiting what was once her bed chambers, she caught Hannah and Johnny on the way to his bedroom.

“May I tuck him into to bed please Mother?” Johnny took Alex’s hand immediately and looked up to the only woman he knew as his mother with a smile. Alexandria returned the smile.

“Of course.” Hanna replied.

Helping the boy change into his night clothes, she sat at the edge of the bed and tucked him in. The crude stuffed bunny was held tight by the little boy.

“Mama? Will you be here when I wake up?”

“I don’t know my darling boy.” She answered truthfully.

Johnny teared up. “Please Mama. I love you. Don’t leave me. Please don’t leave me.”

Alex bit down hard on her lip to keep the tears at bay. Within seconds, she tasted blood. “I cannot make that promise sweetheart. I will try.”

Sitting up, Johnny wrapped his arms around her neck and held close to his precious mama. “You cannot leave Mama. Please don’t go. Please. I have missed you so.”

“Get some rest Johnny. I swear I won’t leave without saying goodbye.” She rubbed his back gently.

“Yes ma’am.”

“Would you like for me to sing to you before you fall asleep?”

“Please Mama.”

Sweet little children’s tunes she sang to him. When her son fell asleep, she got up and left the room. She didn’t even make it to John’s bed chambers when she started to cry. She loved that little boy with all of her heart. The thought of hurting him was painful. Someone cutting her heart out would cause less pain she thought. Sliding down the wall, Alexandria sat upon the floor. Great racking sobs choked her.

The sobs must have been loud enough for John to hear. He stepped out of his room and looked for the source.  He walked over to Alexandria and picked her up from the floor. Carrying her back to what was once their bedroom, John sat in a chair and just held her. He didn’t attempt to stop her tears. He didn’t ask any questions. He held her and let her get the pain out. It was only when the tears finally stopped and her breathing normalized once again, did he speak.

“Are you okay?”

She nodded, not trusting her voice.

“Do you need to talk about what happened?”

“Our son begged me to stay.”

“Our?”

“He will always be my first born John. I may not have given birth to him but he is my son.”

“Does this mean you will stay?”

“Yes.”

“Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me. Thank your son.”

“Will you destroy the annulment?”

“Yes. It seems pointless now.”

“Lay down with me please Alexandria? I just wish to hold you.”

When she nodded, John Thornton carried her to their bed. He was gentle in setting her down upon the mattress. Sliding in next to her, he just held her close. His hand rested lightly on her swollen belly. Alexandria fell asleep within minutes. He felt the baby move against his hand. That prick of fear rose again but he pushed it away. There was no reason to fear. They were only promised the now. Once again, he prayed to God. Don’t ever take her away from me, please Lord. I love her. I would give my life for her and our children. Permit me to keep her with me forever dear Lord, I beg of you.

John and Alexandria woke at their normal time the next morning. Neither had moved from their position from the night before. She cleaned up before he did and went to wake Johnny so that they all may break their fast together.

“Mama? Is it time to eat?”

“Yes it is.”

“Does this mean you are staying?” He looked worried.

“Yes it does.” She smiled gently.

“Thank you.” He hugged her tightly.

“John Thornton II, you are most welcome. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

She, John, and Johnny met Hannah at the breakfast table. Hannah said nothing about the return of her daughter-in-law. She could tell that Alexandria was still a touch skittish when it came to John. She guessed it was because of Johnny that she stayed. It didn’t matter the reason just that she did. Alexandria and John would repair their damaged relationship in due time.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  


	14. Chapter 14

It had been exactly one month since Alexandria had returned to the Thornton home in Milton. She and John had also shared a bed for the first time the night before. They had made love slow and gently. It wouldn’t be long before that would come to an end. Alexandria was due in approximately six weeks.

She rarely thought about her life in the 21st century. This was home, hearth and heart. John was working less in the mill. He had left much of the daily running to Williams and Higgins. His fear of losing Alexandria was still great. He wished to spend as much time with his wife and son as he possibly could.

One afternoon, Alexandria and Hannah Thornton sat sewing in the dining room. They had material spread all over the table. Johnny was with tutor and John was doing paperwork at the mill. It was a comfortable afternoon.

Because she was so far along, Alexandria only went to the clinic when it was needed. Her assistant was there to provide aid for the more general of maladies.

Wincing as the baby provided a nice kick, she rubbed her belly. “Mother Thornton was John this active before he was born?”

Hannah laughed softly. “Yes he was. I often thought he was going to burst out on his own.”

Giving a poke to where the latest of kicks were, Alex smiled. “See here young babe, this is your father’s fault then.”

“What is my fault?” John came into the dining room.

“Your child is kicking hard.” His wife smiled.

Placing his hands on the top of Alexandria’s swollen belly. “See here. Be polite to your Mama!”  He placed a kiss on her cheek before sitting down next to her. 

Looking over the rims of her glasses, Hannah smiled to her son. “The mill is running well John?”

“Yes, Mother. Everything is good. Williams and Higgins are doing an excellent job.”

“When should we expect Dixon again?” The former lady’s maid to both Mrs. Hale and Margaret came once a year to put flowers upon their graves.

“It will be a few more weeks, my love.”

Rising from the chair, Alexandria put a hand to the small of her back. It was hurting her. “If you both shall excuse me, I believe I shall take a short nap.”

“I believe I shall join you then.”

Alexandria looked to her husband and chuckled. “I am surprised you know what a nap is John Thornton!”

“I had one or two as a child.” He tried to hide a smile.

He escorted her off to their chambers. Hannah sighed with relief. John had changed greatly since Alexandria’s return. She was proud that he was able to do so and it didn’t sound forced. She loved her son dearly and was happy that he made amends with his wife. Alexandria was good for him.  In a way that Margaret never had the backbone to be.

In their bed chambers, John helped Alexandria to undress. She had stopped wearing a corset as soon as she knew she was pregnant, so it was much easier.

“Are you really going to take a nap with me John?”

“Of course. It’s not often that I get such a chance. I might as well do it while I am able.” He looked to her with a smile.

John gently pulled his wife close to him. Resting his hand upon her belly, he was gentle. It took Alex no time at all to drift to sleep. He laid there for a long while just watching her. He thanked god that he was given a second chance. Once more he prayed that she would stay with him always. The fear in his gut was rarely spoken of, but there it sat.

Slowly Alexandria woke up. Stretching, she nuzzled against John’s chest. Her eyes opened to find him staring down at her.

“Did you sleep at all?”

“I found watching you far more restful.” He kissed her lips gently.  “I love you Alex.”

“I love you as well John.”

On her back, she drew her arms under her. “I feel like a turtle that has landed on its back.”

“You are far lovelier than a turtle.” John tickled the top of her belly, making her giggle. “Do you need help?”

Alexandria mock scowled at John and started to giggle once more. “Yes, please.”

Helping her sit up, he sat behind her. Having Alex lean most of her weight back against him, John kissed the curve of her ear.

“I’m worried Alexandria.”

“About the birth?”

“Yes.”

Taking his left hand, Alex placed it on her belly with her hand over his. “This is our child John. Ours. As odd as our relationship may have started, this baby is a gift to us from God. I am strong and healthy my husband. There is no need to worry. I know that won’t stop you from worrying.” She smiled. “Look at our hands John. We wear our wedding rings. We will be bonded together through everything. Trust in that.”

“I trust in you Alex.”

“I trust in you John.”

“As much as I would love to stay here in bed all day, Mother most likely expects us for tea.”

After dinner, Hannah was working on a few last things for the baby. John and Alexandria had been reading but went to play with Johnny before his bedtime. All three of them were seated on the floor playing Go Fish. Hannah heard the laughter from the playroom, she couldn’t help but smile. It had taken a while, but John was happy and so was his family.  

It was just perhaps two more weeks when the unexpected happened. Alexandria was sitting down tutoring Johnny in mathematics, when a burning pain hit her. 

“Sweetheart, will you please ask your grandmother to send for your father and then come back her with you?”

“Is something wrong Mama?”

“My boy everything is fine. So would you please?”

“Yes ma’am.”

Johnny returned with his grandmother, only to sit back down next to his mother.

“Is it time?”

“Yes Mother, I believe so.”

“I sent one of the maids to go get John and another to get the midwife. Let’s start getting you ready.”

“Johnny, I need to go into the other room for a while. Your new baby brother or sister is going to be here soon.” Alexandria smiled.

“Yes Mama. Will you be okay?”

“Of course!” Standing, she kissed the top of her son’s head. “I will see you very soon.”

Standing, Hannah led Alex to the newly redone nursery. A soft cry of surprise, suddenly her water broke.  Startled, Alex had no idea what to say after that. Right as they were going into the nursery room, John came running in.

Pale and breathing hard, his eyes were wide. “Alexandria!”

Smiling softly, she kissed his cheek. “Everything is okay John. My water just broke.”

“John, let me get your wife ready and then you can see her until the midwife arrives.”

Dressed only in a nightgown, Alexandria got comfortable on the bed. Hannah opened the door to allow John in, but she wouldn’t let him to get too close to his wife.

“Mother!”

“John, it is not seemly to allow a husband into the birthing room as it is.”

“Mother Thornton, it is fine. I am not fully in labor yet. Besides, in other places the husband stays with his wife.” And in other centuries Alex thought.

He moved to the side of the bed and picked up his wife’s hand. The fear in John’s eyes was easily noticed. “I’m afraid Alex.”

Rarely did he call her by her nickname and Alex smiled hearing it. Kissing his hand softly. “Everything is perfect my love. I am in excellent health. It may take a while seeing as it is my first time but everything will be fine.” She touched his face lovingly.

“I don’t want to leave you.”

“Then don’t. There is no reason for you to.” Alexandria dropped her voice into a whisper. “Your mother may try to strangle you if you stay.” She grinned at him.

John grinned back. “I believe you to be correct Dr. Thornton.”

“I usually am.” She sassed back at him.

“Isn’t it too early for you to be giving birth?”

Shaking her head, she smiled. “Due dates are a guessing game sweetheart, not to worry. And as often as we make love, it becomes even more of a guessing game.”

“Alexandria!!” John was mortified.

Starting to laugh when a contraction hit, the laugh ended in a wince.

“Alex, are you alright?” The fear returned in John’s eyes.

“Yes. Fine as can be. Giving birth is somewhat painful.” She chuckled.

“My mother may be right. I am not sure I can watch you be in such pain.” John kissed his wife on the lips. “I love you.”

“I love….”

Alexandria was unable to finish the sentence. A sharp pain hit, but this wasn’t in the abdomen. It was in her chest. In less than a blink of an eye, everything went dark. The last thing she remembered was screaming for her husband.

“CLEAR!”

There was the pain again. She couldn’t fight it. Her body felt like lead.

“We have a pulse! Get her on the bus.”

Bus? Why would I be on a bus? She didn’t recognize it was a slang term for an ambulance. All of a sudden Alexandria felt as if she were screaming but there was no sound. Then the blackness took over once again.

Beeps, sounds, smells. They were all familiar but not. Her head hurt something vicious as did her chest. Opening her eyes, the lights were blinding. Lights? Candles don’t make that much light.

“Welcome back Alex.” Robert Copeland spoke softly to his daughter. His hand wrapped around hers.

“D-d-dad?”

“Yes precious?”

“No no no no no!!! I have to go home. I have to go home!!” Panic set in. Where was John? She needed to go back. Running her hand downward, her belly was flat as it always had been. Alex started to pull out the IV and detach all of the equipment. “DAD LET ME GO!! I DON’T BELONG HERE!!!” Struggling, her father was holding her down. Alex fought, screaming. Within seconds, everything went dark again. She had been given a sedative.

Hours later, Alex woke again. This time she cautiously opened her eyes. Again panic set in, this time she controlled it. Why was she here? What was going on? Tears spilled. “Dad?” She rasped.

“I’m right here Alex. Let me get you some water.”

Taking a couple of sips, she looked around once more. “What happened?”

“What is the last thing you remember?”

“I don’t know.” She lied. The last thing was she was in labor.

“You were at our place. We were outside watching the storm. Lightening hit the tree and tossed a limb. You pushed me out of the way. But the way it hit you, you almost died.”

“How long ago?”

“Maybe six hours? I haven’t kept track.”

How did all of that happen in six hours? Alexandria felt confused. Her chest hurt. “I want to go home. I need to go home.”

“Alex, your heart stopped. You can’t go home yet.”

“No. no. You don’t understand.” She coughed. “I need to. I have to. This isn’t the place for me.” It became too much. The pain was more for the life she wanted not the life she had. She would never see her husband and children again. How could a dream feel so real? Nothing made sense.

This time she didn’t open her eyes. Nothing mattered anyway. The sense of despair wrapped tight around Alex. She wished that the branch would have killed her. To be given love and a family and have it taken away so quickly seemed cruel. Perhaps she could go back? It would take something drastic, but it was possible yes? What medications would be kept in the stores in the hospital room? Alexandria started to run down a list. Nothing seemed all too useful. Perhaps a scalpel?

The pain was catching back up as was the medication being given her. It was back to the darkness.

When she woke hours later, there was nobody in the room with her. Helping herself sit up using the bed controls, Alexandria wept openly. All she wanted was to return to Milton. She missed John, Johnny, and Hannah. What would their child have been? A boy or a girl? Would John have been happy? Did she die or disappear in that world or was it just a dream?

“Hey there sleepy head.”

Confused, Alex turned her head towards the voice. “J-J-John?”

“What is it my love?”

“How can this be?”

“How can what be my beautiful wife?”

Looking down at her hand, there was the ring that John had given her in Milton. Alexandria was even more confused.

“I will let you two have some privacy John. I am going to find a decent cup of coffee.” Robert Copeland stood up and stretched before leaving.

He looked like John. Those beautiful blue grey eyes and aquiline nose. The way he smiled. The sound of his voice. It was all her John.

“I had a dream……”

“Oh? What was the dream?”

“We lived in Milton back in the 1860s.”

John chuckled softly. “That wasn’t a dream Dr. Thornton. That was a memory.”

“How? Wait. What? I don’t understand.”

“Remember when I told you that I had prayed continuously for God to keep us together forever?”

Alex nodded mutely.

“He answered that prayer. We have spent so many lifetimes together my beloved, never to be parted. I’m glad that you are starting to remember some of them. We have been granted the gift of undying love.”

“Johnny? And?”

“Johnny and Claire are at home with my mother. You have nothing whatsoever to fear.”

Alexandria started to weep yet again. Worry crossed John Thornton’s face, rising he sat on the edge of the bed. Holding his wife while she cried.

“Are you bothered by this realization Alexandria?”

“They are tears of joy John. I love you.”

“I love you too. Forever and a day.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Super special thank you to miss fizzy and miss patanghill. THANK YOU Y'all know why. *GRIN*


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